By Julene L. Jones
Excerpt from Thesis of Graduate Research Paper, April 23, 2013
Title: Motivations for Disaffiliation from the Two-by-Two Sect
By Julene L. Jones for University of Kentucky, Lexington, KY
The purpose of the survey was to discover what motivated some to disaffiliate from the 2×2 church.
Qualtrics survey included (76) ex-2x2s including 1 ex-worker; and (1) 2×2 (#76).
77 Reasons for leaving the 2×2 Church:
1. At the time I left, I was unsettled by inconsistencies I noticed in the previous year. It started with noticing self-righteousness, being proud of ones humility. Shortly before I left, I was shaken from learning about sexual indiscretions by the workers, with the final straw being hearing a contradictory statement from a worker at convention. Since the preaching and testimonies are supposed to be what God gives the individual to speak, how could He give a contradictory statement? So, upon that observation and the subsequent scolding from my father, I realized I was more unsettled than ever.
Boiled down, the initial reasons for leaving were mostly surface observations that didn’t make sense at the time. Later, I began to research online on forums, boards, and the few sites that exist. After about six years after I left, I stumbled upon a site called “Preach the Word” where a minister had a sermon series exposing cults and the dangers of associating with them. After hearing the sermon specifically about the Two by Twos, I felt that my leaving was justified. I felt I had definitive, scriptural proof the Two by Twos are a toxic religion. I felt peace with that knowledge. For me, to know that I am not involved with a religion that is illegitimate by concept and design, has given me the strength and peace to carry on with my life. A few specific reasons I left:
– 2x2s lied about origins
– 2x2s protect ministers who abuse their position of power
– 2x2s are repressive, especially to women
– 2x2s are inconsistent in their actions compared to what they believe and preach
–2x2s rob people of their spirit
– members become like robots
– Worker-worship
2. Once my eyes were opened to the way other Christians led their lives I began to disagree with the way The Truth did things. Then I learned of all of the sexual abuse being hidden, the way money was passed, excommunications, and most of all the hypocrisy, I left and knew I would never go back.
3. See the following link http://www.anotherstep.net/ourstory/
4. False doctrine, Financial fraud, Misled about history of the church, Sex abuse cover up in the ministry, Preaches only true path to heaven, Uncomfortable around members, Corrupt leaders, Disbelief in God
5. I discovered information online that outlined the history of the 2x2s (how it was started in the late 1800s by William Irvine in Ireland). Having never felt a true conviction to ‘profess’, but doing it because it was expected of me, it was the final step in deciding that I had no interest in continuing what I had long considered a farce of a life. Even after discovering all that info, and knowing I wanted to leave, it still took me 3 years to make the final break. That’s how brainwashed and unsure I was.
6. Main reason: exclusivity. Belief that the 2×2 was the only right way.
7. Because their beliefs and practices didn’t line up with the Bible–which they claimed was their only standard. Because they lied; claimed they started with Jesus – and the truth was they started with Wm Irvine about 100 years ago. Because I was in close contact with others I could not deny were Christians who were not 2x2s; which meant the F&Ws were not God’s Only True Way on earth. Asked myself: Why stay in such a hard way to serve God? And didn’t want the heavy burdens to be put on my children also. So I cut short my losses, left the 2×2 system and began a mission to help other questioning 2×2 learn about the history, et al.
8. It was a gradual process- the leaving. I started finding more and more info about the Cooneyites which the group I attended never said anything about. Started going to less and less mtgs and kinda climaxed with a total leaving of the group and upset. I was able to sort things out and come to live at peace with myself seeing the 2×2’s as victims themselves. I thank the internet. Wouldn’t have much of a clue aside from the internet what was happening. I feel that leaving the 2x2s is making me so much the wiser and been learning ever since in all respects
9. I realized that almost everything the 2x2s believed in was actually exceedingly judgmental and small minded. Their legalistic beliefs led to so much abuse: physical, sexual, but most prevalent (at least that I knew about) was psychological. Their beliefs, and their blind faith in them still haunt me.
10. first, I need to clarify some previous answers 1 “Professing” is poorly defined. I consider myself still professing Godliness, just not in the 2×2 system.
2. Both my parents are deceased, professing 2x2ism until they died in their 90’s.
3. My first wife “professed” 2x2ism, rejecting that system twenty years before she slipped into eternity.
4. My present wife is not, and has never professed 2x2ism. I was falsely accused of something I simply was totally innocent of doing/being, and excommunicated. Now I know I was being set free but it was very difficult to endure at the time.
11. I left in the late 1970’s as a teen. The rules were too oppressive and I felt I would be going to hell anyways for living a double life- so why not just quit. Mom and Dad were both professing so it was difficult.
12. I left the Truth for several reasons, and I will try to be as informative to you as possible. First, I don’t agree with several of their practices, such as not celebrating Christmas or any other Christian holidays, because I feel that this is just bizarre and never received a satisfactory answer when I asked. I also never understood why pants were so “worldly” and not allowed. My mother made me wear shorts in the winter time to school because she wouldn’t allow pants of any kind, and this is without leggings or tights. Crazy!! There just seemed to be a double standard for the men and women of the religion concerning clothing.
Also, the church is extremely exclusive and seems to shun those unaffiliated and look down on non-members for no apparent reason other than they are not professing. There was never any concern for the outside community or helping others less fortunate. I also found it particularly odd that the workers or the leaders of the church received no education or training in theology, but the majority of lessons were based on personal interpretations, so you can imagine how varied the church was nationally when you saw the different community cultures within the church from region to region. I also never felt like the focus was on a relationship with God, but doing what the workers told you and fitting in. It seems like members would just accept certain beliefs that had been handed down to them by other members and workers that had convinced them it was right without viable explanation or reasoning.
What really did it for me is the fact that it came to light that several head members of the church were raping girls and one of them happened to be very close to me and nothing was ever done about it by anyone. Some workers were even caught molesting children and I just thought that the culture of the church created opportunities for this to continue through their secrecy and exclusion of “worldly” influences. I felt more like I was being brainwashed rather than encouraged to grow spiritually and this church preyed on people that may have been more vulnerable than others. There is a blatant lack of organization or any type of true administration and education for leaders. It is just a joke to me and I am thrilled to not have to feel guilty about wearing pants now, a weight has been lifted when I discovered what a relationship with God was really like and this church was not “The Way”.
13. When I left I had spent six years preparing for a place in the work. This means I had been accepted but put on a waiting list until the overseer of my area felt that I was old enough to start in the work. The 2x2s were my life – everything I did was for the group, the workers, and to help others find the truth so that they would not go to a lost eternity. I spent that time with the workers learning about their lives and I started to see people being mistreated within the group and came to a decision that I could not in good conscience suggest that other people join a group where there was so much abuse.
At this point I also came to see the way the group conducted itself as very unhealthy. I couldn’t accept the attitudes that I was expected to adopt about others outside of the group. The thing was that I was so indoctrinated into the group that I felt that I was caught between a rock and a hard spot. I didn’t want to go to an unsaved eternity especially as I was a prodigal and was in that space of not being a worker but not being just a normal Friend. Yet, I couldn’t live in the hell that the 2×2 group had become. I felt that I couldn’t grow anymore that I was being stifled and there were many other reasons but not being able to live with myself inside of the group perhaps was the biggest reason for leaving.
14. I went away to college and formed my own opinions.
15. Felt too restricted in pursuing career path, esp as NO family professed, ie no ties. But I would have left MUCH earlier if I knew the celibate ministry was/is having sex with each other, with married Friends, with children …
16. As I mentioned I was in the work for 14 years. I got burned out as I found the life of the work very difficult. I have an introverted personality and all the endless visits and two hour meals, 3 times a day exhausted me mentally. So when I left the work, I exercised my right to privacy and except for a few Friends I didn’t hang out with the Friends and I only went to Sunday morning and the occasional gospel meeting. It helped me to process things better. I realized there were some things that while in the work, I tried to ignore. For instance, the many, many things I did as a worker that was for the conscience of others, but not my own. I began to wonder why would there be things that God did not convict me of that I am expected to do? Isn’t the whole premise that we did not have to go through a high priest, but could communicate directly with God and be convicted and taught.
Also during the years in the work, I had taken on attitudes that judged people on how well they fit into this system called “the way”. Somehow I was taught that, because I was not alone in that attitude. I was taught that the weak were more likely to be judged by the workers rather than shown longsuffering or patience. Jesus would seek the weak over the strong and the “religious”. In my years as an the older worker, I saw favoritism shown by one of the overseers and unbridled envy and jealousy by co-workers.
I lost confidence in my own conviction that there was power in this type of worship to actually have the Spirit of Christ in our life. It seemed as though there was no power to do what Jesus said, ” As I have loved you, love ye one another, by this shall all men know that you are my disciples.” It seemed that, that was not how we were identifying ourselves as disciples at all. I knew from being in the work that workers for the most part, are defensive about being asked questions. I cannot speak for any other worker then myself, but my defensiveness was because I also questioned and didn’t have the answers. But I was not ready to acknowledge that yet.
17. Because they believe they are the only ones with a chance at salvation which means everyone but them will burn in hell for eternity.
18. I became very disillusioned when my sister-in-law worker made demands that I leave my own home with my family (including husband children & my own mother living with me at the time) & move into my father-in-laws home so she could go back into the work after she had been home taking care of her mother. It wasn’t just that she demanded it but insinuated that that I was selfish if I didn’t do so & my husband was “henpecked” because he wouldn’t make me do so. It was also that another sister worker attempted to talk me into moving. Not one worker stood by me & said anything against her. Only one of the friends made any effort to show any sympathy for me. All of these reasons why, not only she, but all the friends acting the way that they did-began to dawn on me of just how the internal workings of the truth were so psychologically manipulating.
19. Judgementalism and Exclusivism
20. I went back to school to get my masters and realized how much I was missing in terms of socialization and culture. I was not supposed to have friends “outside.” I was also looked down upon for continuing my education. I began feeling more and more restricted.
21. My first wife was a slut and deserted my son and myself a week after his 2nd birthday. After 4 years I remarried and was tossed out. But, I was planning on leaving. I was told to pray for my wife’s death, rather than bother the workers about permission to remarry.
22. I left the 2×2’s after learning about all of the CSA and other sexual crimes that have been going on in the worker-ship for almost the entire 2×2 existence. I also was one that had been lied to about the origins of the 2×2 faith. I refused to back up the 2×2 faith with my presence or my money!
23. I quit believing in that type of God
24. Did not like the restrictive lifestyle. Wanted to be like our “Worldly” friends, and people we worked with. Did not like being exclusive and our contempt of other Churches.
25. God called me away from the group.
26. It’s a cult
27. Got fed up with the lies and criticisms of other religions
28. I came to the realization that they weren’t the “only way” to Heaven; that there were other Christians out there. I saw the cruel way they manipulated people with guilt, shame and other ways of spiritual abuse–and it didn’t seem like God would operate in that manner.
29. Discovered that William Irvine was “the beginning” not what I was always taught, ie “the shores of Galilee.”
30. 1. The discovery of the true origins of the religion and knowledge that I was lied to as a child by one who was present on the first bicycle mission in 1897-98. The conflicts between how Jesus did things and how the Workers did things such as healing, dealing with divorce, and ex-communicating. The realization that most were not motivated by love but by fear of displeasing the others.
31. The more I saw, the more I saw people being hypocritical.
32. An extended discussion of my exit can be found at this link; I post under the pseudonym of ‘what’.
http://professing.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=17741
[A portion of this respondent’s initial post in the thread provided is included here:]
Quit, Pushed out or Excommunicated? This is the central question that seems to be driving much of the contention about our leaving the Friends & Workers fellowship both on-line and in discussion with our friends. I certainly did quit going to meeting because it was an act of volition on my part. Yet, I continue to feel I was pushed out. I read the withdrawal of meeting privileges from our home as a distancing action which while not intended to make us quit, threw serious impediments into our opportunity for service. Some of the friends are wanting me to think of it as purely a material decision made by the workers; that Bible studies in split homes can cause practical issues within the marriage, so caution needs to be exercised, et cetera. But somehow I don’t really feel this has been done for my own good.
From the other side of the fence, some Ex-2x2s feel I was ex-communicated from the fellowship. IOW, the workers preferred to see me leave. I don’t actually believe that either. Interesting how we interpret events to re-inforce our own baseline assumptions about life’s matters. […] I have decided that service to my God and Saviour is likely better placed in some other regiment, so we will see where this goes. The most significant change in my core beliefs is that unity in the kingdom is enhanced through my being open to the Spirits’ work in the lives of all who confess the Christ (1 John 4), regardless of their ultimate disposition before the Throne. I would like to have retained that working assumption from within the F&W fellowship, but it seems that our actions along that line have been ‘read’ in a much different way than we intended. The result of that is that the workers took actions that distanced us from the fellowship, and well, here we are.
33. Did not believe in God.
34. I was not willing to live the lifestyle – it was very strict in the 1960s.
35. I professed after having a dream that I was burning in hell. Fear is not a good motivator for me, and before long I just could not keep up the charade of following the dress code, saying all the right things when praying and in testimony, and being a “good” girl. I had been told that I would have to give up my unprofessing boyfriend in order to be baptized and, although I did it, I was furious and never got over being angry. After a few years of dressing and looking like a freak, I just stopped going. I never felt God’s presence. I always thought something must be wrong with me because I had no joy.
36. History cover-up. Earthly Founder. Unbiblical. The more I learned the less I could stand being associated with them.
37. Even though I was born and raised going to meeting, I never believed. I hated the hypocrisy of it all even as a young kid. I was allowed to act one way away from meeting (wore jeans, went to movies, played sports, watched TV) then had to hide all those things about myself around the friends. I also never logically understood how we could be the only people in the entire world that would go to heaven. Because of these main things, I have never attended meetings again after moving out of my parents house in 2002.
38. At the age of 15 worked out I was growing up in a cult. It took another 4 years before I had the courage to leave. At the time I was fully prepared to leave my family as well.
39. Offended by [name removed] (worker). Left because they told me to quit reading and praying with another professing friend. I followed Matthew 18:15-21 and they were very upset. The main reason I left was because they taught that I should obey them instead of God. See https://ex2x2.info/2025/01/03/why-i-left/
40. confusion and bad teaching from parents that makes it impossible to feel peace in the meetings. I would like to work out this confusion so I could share in the fellowship with my wife and kids.
41. I didn’t really believe but was very passive about leaving. Knowing the family trauma etc that it would cause vs my ability to stay under the radar and live my own life. However, I married “outside” and that meant the local Overseer got involved. He considered this required a period where I (we) would attend gospel meetings only, followed by a “we’ll see..” decision point. At that point I realized I had no reason to go back, and I didn’t. (Your “changes since leaving” question later is imprecise. Take drinking alcohol, for example: I drank alcohol before I left the 2×2 so drinking it now is not a change…. Same with most of the other questions – radio, cinema, makeup, etc )
42. I had professed as a teenager and was baptized at convention. After convention, I was envisioning my future life as a ‘2×2’. I came to the realization that I could no longer go on and pretend or act as if I was a perfect ‘2×2’. I just knew in my heart, there was ‘no way’ that I could follow all the unwritten ‘rules’. SO GOD AND I HAD A “LITTLE TALK”. “I’m in an impossible situation!” “I just got baptized as the next step for an approved ‘2×2”. “I knew that I was a ‘hypocrite’ – A person who pretends to be an approved ‘2×2’ but in reality I was not. “If the only way to get to heaven is via the “only way 2×2’s”, then I guess I was destined to go to hell.” “So if I was going to hell – then it seems that I had no choice but to have a ‘hell of a good time” getting there.” “Finally – I knew that there I was ‘no way’ that I could continue to be a ‘2×2’.” “God – So what do I do now?” |
I don’t believe God actually answered me at this time. God totally answered my ‘impossible situation!’ much later in life. At the time of my ‘little talk’ – It seemed to me that God would have become ‘very angry’ with me and ‘all hell would occur’ – This didn’t happen – in fact nothing happened! However, a warm, comfortable feeling came over me. God seemed to answer! “DON’T WORRY – BE HAPPY”/”EVERYTHINGS OKAY”/“I AM NOT ANGRY”
I left the 2x2s over 40 years ago. The main reason was that I was not going to be a “hypocrite” because I knew that’s what I would have been if I had continued to try to live up to the ‘expected unwritten rules and regulations’
43. I was asked to stop going to meetings and taking part. I did not chose this, but this was decided by the workers and I was told of their decision when I went to Sun morning meeting
44. I met some Christians and attended a church service outside of meetings and realized they had something we did not have. The Holy Spirit touched me and opened my eyes. And then after that I read a book with a couple of pages about the meetings in it which stated that the group had been started by a man and not Jesus like we had been taught,
45. Lack of belief in the Christian God Sexual abuse by a worker
46. Sexually molested by 2 workers as a child, 50+ years ago. Sold convention ground in name of Christian conventions of Australia, lied about it deception by claiming no knowledge. Cover up of criminal CSA
47. I was very unhappy with the hypocrisy present in the 2×2 church. I eventually came to believe that it is just another man made church. At that point I left to find a more biblically sound church
48. In my experience with leaving meetings (May 2010), I took it upon myself to read and contemplate what was written in the New Testament about salvation and prayed fervently to God that he would grant me an understanding that would lead to peace in my life. I hope I can make myself clear, but what I received from that process was an understanding about salvation by grace that stood apart from what I had absorbed from being in meetings my whole life. I realized that my beliefs about salvation were essentially “assumed” beliefs as opposed to beliefs that I received from my own searching of scriptures and praying to God. That is not the fault of the “fellowship” but I believe it is the experience of many who were raised in it.
I don’t recall workers in Gospel meeting providing an expository teaching of the scriptures that pertain to salvation, but rather more about “the ministry of Christ”, meeting in the home and justification of the 2×2 way being the only right way. They of course did not come out and directly say that the fellowship was the only true way. Instead, a person listening draws the inference over a long period of meetings. I feel very strongly that the preaching of the “Gospel story” can be delivered very directly in a couple of meetings. Unfortunately, the workers are burdened with trying to tell the story of Jesus PLUS indirectly show people that the fellowship is the only true way until “they” get the revelation.
49. I went to graduate school in an area of the country with very few friends. I couldn’t imagine not professing, but once peer pressure was reduced, I started doing things with worldly friends and then started missing more and more meetings. No one chased after me. I drifted away. I had to do a lot of processing a few years later.
50. The way is incredibly legalistic and unfortunately unwilling to accept questioning. I questioned the stance on Divorce and remarriage, celibacy for the ministry, this being the only way, double standards and so on. Unfortunately upon doing this I was labeled as unwilling, bitter, questioning, a trouble maker….and on and on. As a male I never had the double standard that was imposed on the women but had serious reservations about that as well. I actually had a good childhood, but had issues with doctrine, self-righteousness, hiding issues, double talk and other (unfortunately) unchristian behavior from people who claimed to be “the only ones”.
51. Realization that the 2x2s were no different than any other denomination; that workers do not agree among themselves on major points of doctrine; boredom!
52. (1) The workers used my name as a false witness against a new convert whom they excommunicated.
(2) The worker stopped the Sunday meeting to scold my wife about something she knew nothing about.
(3) The workers lied to and about each other and the friends to have a young man arrested and prosecuted.
(4) I was accused of promoting immorality among the young people — I actually confronted the workers with their lies young people.
(5) The elder and another man from our meeting met in jail and one refused to speak to the other because he was “evil”.
(6) A worker told me my wife and I had a perverted private relationship — very long story.
(7) People were being booted out and we were advised not to speak with them or anything.
(8) I was reported to the police for disturbing the church, by a man I who did not come to my meeting.
(9) The elder of the meeting screamed for 90 minutes non-stop and uninterrupted on the phone — the workers approved.
(10) The elder’s wife told me in front of the workers that my wife makes her sick to her stomach, and repeated it.
(11) I was accused of having a convention for people who had been put out of meetings — it was really a picnic of professing friends.
(12) Overseers were consulting about what to do about the “convention” I was planning.
(13) I reported a worker to the police for raping children for 25 years, and he got life in prison.
(14) The workers where I live now preach a different gospel than where I came from.
(15) The ex-Catholic 5-year professing elder of our meeting gave me a long lecture about there being workers’ lists every year since Jesus Christ.
(16) He told me I had an evil spirit and he couldn’t have fellowship with me.
(17) The friends in the area were all told to avoid socializing with me and my family.
(18) The wife of the man who reported me to the police perjured herself in court on her husband’s direction — in a case against another friend.
(19) Workers 2000 miles away, whom I’d never met, were warning my friends (Friends) to shun me because I was teaching a false doctrine. Eventually a worker told me what the false doctrine was, and I had never heard of it and none of my friends ever heard of it.
(20) I made it my business to become knowledgeable on the history of the 2x2s and Christianity (27 credit hours of university credits).
(21) They tried to kick me out, but they couldn’t ever prove I had lied about anything, so I left on my own terms.
53. The “weight” of it all became more than I could bear. I chose to “go to hell” rather than continuing, even though I really didn’t understand what was causing the “weight”. I had been divorced for 5 years, and the “gospel grapevine” and shunning was horrible, but I didn’t realize at the time that it had anything to do with my leaving.
54. The exclusivity of the 2x2s believing that they are the only ones who are ‘saved’. The focus on ‘the meeting in the home’ and ‘the homeless preacher’ as being necessary for salvation, rather than a focus on Christ. The fact that, when the Friends speak about ‘the Way’ and ‘the Truth’, they are not speaking about Christ, but the meetings. The fact that they do not ask if someone is ‘Christian’, but rather, if someone is ‘professing’. In fact, in my experience, ‘worldly Christians’ and other churches were seen as being damned. One did not associate with other Christians, unless it was to invite them to a mission of.
Also, and most importantly, the fact that I was never sure if I was saved because salvation depended on more than the blood of Christ – I had to live like Christ (and because he was ‘just a man who came to show us how to live’) it meant that I should be able to live like that too. Of course, I couldn’t, because I’m human and I became more and more depressed because I knew I could never be good enough no matter how hard I tried. I believe I am saved by grace through faith in Christ and his atoning blood – not by works or anything I can do myself. However, a doctrine of ‘grace’ is seldom, if ever, preached by the 2×2 ministry. I hope these comments give some idea. I could write reams but these are the main reasons.
55. When I discovered that the beginnings in Ireland. This led to further investigation and the lies became to much to tolerate.
56. Two main reasons: (1.) I discovered discrepancies by the score between what Workers teach and what the Bible teaches – for example we were taught by Workers that Jesus Christ was/is our elder brother, “a man just like you and me” while the Bible clearly shows Him in control of laying down and taking up His life, as well as entering a locked room without opening the lock or the door (for just a couple of the superhuman things He performed.
(2.) We were taught by Workers that our church “went right back to Christ” “was established by Christ” (in the first century, while many of those Workers were very much aware that the 2×2 church was founded by William Irvine in the later 1800s in Ireland — i.e., those Workers knowingly lied to us while claiming to be the only human spokespersons for God on earth.
57. Found that my beliefs had changed and I did not fit in
58. My desire to experience life and live “normally”; join the human race, was stronger than my convictions for my family’s belief system. The legalism became so oppressive along with my inability to reconcile what I read in the Bible with how we did things. I also came to know normal Christians who attended normal churches (or not) who were more confident and real in their salvation than I (and many Friends and family) and who were doing more for God’s Kingdom than I saw anyone in the “truth” doing, workers and Friends alike. Two of my father’s four siblings are lifetime workers, (his youngest brother and only sister, now in their 80s) highly revered, “famous workers”, so I would (or am) still highly recognizable amongst the Friends. Lots of family and extended peer pressure to remain inside. I am now age 56, married with three children, so I’m long removed from the cult but because of mother and four siblings still in, it remains part of my life and experience.
59. Had a hard time following the rule book which consisted of 2 rules. (1.) Do what the Workers say. (2.) If you do not do what the Workers say you are out! Also, [name removed] and his inappropriate behavior with a young lady in our meeting was the final straw.
60. Legalism, false doctrine, exclusive beliefs, not growing in faith, dishonesty with history,
61. It was not right
62. There was never a definitive time when I left. I just drifted away. I grew up in what they called a “divided home”. My subsequent lifestyle wasn’t conducive to being in meeting.
63. The 2×2 doctrine as preached by the workers did not align to the Bible Key areas of difference were the 2×2’s did not preach grace, did not believe in the Trinity and had a form of ministry which did not match the way in which the gospel was preached to the Gentiles. The 2×2’s were exclusive and did not accept that any other Christians outside their way could be saved. When questioned about key beliefs the main 2×2 workers were incredibly defensive and accusatory.
64. I realized that if I invited an outsider to Gospel meetings that I did not believe many of the things they were bound to hear. It got down to that I could not in good conscience promote to others what my life was centered around. I could no longer live with the hypocrisy.
65. I had suspected for many, many years that the group was not what it said it was. I had studied other cults, (Mormons) for many years as well. I became VERY ill in 2008, and needed assistance, financially, medically, emotionally, and socially. I had been unable to go to meetings due to my illness (I was NEVER contacted by anyone from my meeting, nor any workers). Because I was home alone a lot, and still had internet access, I began to read the newspaper reports from Ireland, those very early reports of Irvine’s shenanigans, and began to put all the pieces together.
I also began to realize that my paternal grandparents must have been approached by those very early workers, in South Dakota, or Nebraska. I spent several hours studying the timelines connecting Irvine’s workers and my family of origin. AS my illness worsened, and I was even more alone and had thoughts of suicide, one night I literally fell on the floor begging the Lord to make all of this information clear to me. One Friday AM, I could no longer take the pain of my illness, and called 911 for help. I spent 10 days in the hospital, 4 pints of blood, among many other treatments, including serious surgery on my stomach.
When I came home, I spent hours praying for the REAL TRUTH. Just before Thanksgiving in 2009 I was feeling well enough to return to meetings, I went with my only sibling and his wife. He was elder that day, in the home that the meetings were in, the bread and wine were passed, I took my tiny piece of bread, and when the lady next to me went to pass the cup, my sister in law reached out in front of me and took the cup away. I watched to see if my brother had seen it, and he had not. That was the final straw. I had received NO HELP whatsoever from any professing persons, including my family. My family was of no help either. I had read about the shunning that would happen, but I had ALREADY been shunned way before I stopped going.
I went home that day, and praised the Good Lord that he had led me OUT of the burdens of that cultic faith. I was totally disillusioned about the negative impact that the group had had on my family of origin. I was not really angry, just sorry that my ancestors had ever come into contact with these people. My sibling and his wife, remain in the clutches of the group, but the REALLY good news is that my niece’s husband and her children have left the group as well. I have prayed and prayed for the truth, the REAL TRUTH to be revealed to them some day. Thanks for your studies of this group,
66. We (my wife and I) were excommunicated in 1999 because we refused to unconditionally support the workers in actions they had been taking to remove certain Friends from the fellowship (I.e. excommunicate them), and in removal of meetings from some homes where the elders had raised concerns regarding some of the workers’ actions and behavior. Our reasons for not supporting their actions was because of concerns we had regarding moral behavior of some workers, the way that money was being obtained through estates, etc.
67. I struggled with 2 issues: (1.) The origins of the 2X2’s. I was told it was passed down from Jesus but I didn’t believe it and was never convinced with the lack of evidence presented to show me that it did. I read a lot about the dark ages and the killing off of the Apostles and early Christian Church so I knew that no Church (other than Catholicism) survived the dark ages in an organised form.
(2.) I struggled with the claimed authority of the leaders to act in God’s name – i.e. lack of Priesthood authority to baptise and make rules for members (friends). It seemed to ad-hoc form me and up to the workers own decisions on everything that mattered. That did not seem to be how God would run his Church on Earth as he is a God of Order. These 2 issues came to a head when I was in my late teens and I was accused of serious sin that I did not commit. I was never given a chance to tell my side of the story…just accused of the sin by the workers and then told I was not to participate in meetings. This confirmed that the workers had no God-given authority or guidance from the Holy Ghost as they would have known that what I was accused of was false if they were truly inspired by the right source.
68. Two of the friends from my meeting were arrested for different crimes and it started a three-year cascade of events (and revelations for me!). We had seen too much corruption and hypocrisy. My mother and I left together and my father followed less than 1 year later. I am fifth generation born-and-raised in the church so it was a big deal.
69. Once I discovered the true origins of the 2x2s, I couldn’t close my eyes to the truth (unintentional pun!). I had always questioned many things. I am a seeker, and a questioner, and that was never encouraged. I was held captive by the “one true way” until I learned that it didn’t actually date back to Jesus. Once I was confident of that, I walked away.
70. My professing mother died suddenly at 56yrs. i found no comfort from mtg people at that stage as common talk was it was God’s will. I found more realistic comfort and support from some good friends I had met through my work. I was becoming disillusioned with it all. My spiritual experience was changing and I could not in honestly uphold that lifestyle anymore. I still am a spiritual person but time has revealed to me how ‘cultish’ the meetings was especially now with reading the info about William Irvine. Unfortunately my mother died before I knew about all this and could not discuss it with her. I feel sorry on her behalf as she believed it was the original true way and not started by man! it seems all a bit of a farce now. Cheers.
71. We are the only “true” Christians talk. This fellowship goes back to the shores of Galilee, was an outright lie (hidden origin). Call themselves non-denominational when they are very denominational. Told me I had to quit smoking to be baptized…Jesus did not lay that on me. (I did quit smoking later). The workers snaring people. It’s all about the workers: they are the Pharisees Jesus spoke of. The money: they keep all donations and pretend to be poor. They don’t care for anyone. I like Christians that nurse others and build hospitals, and orphanages and schools to glorify God in the name of Jesus their savior. The workers are just about their own glory. They can see no other glory. I could just go on and on like this, but will stop here.
72. I was ‘groomed’ for the work throughout my childhood – this however coincided with my realization that I was gay. I had to fight very hard to make sense of deal with my identity in terms of the limited frame of reference we were raised in. It so happened that at this time, that I also discovered the lies behind the meetings – and it completely caused my whole world to shatter. It became a good reason for me to leave, and deal with my sexuality once I was out of the confines of the meetings.
73. Realized that I didn’t believe in God from a very young age (around 10-12) and started to try and withdraw from meetings, avoid convention whenever possible. Reasons for leaving the truth in particular was the contradictory teachings, murky history, lack of theological clarity and of course, with any religion, outright unsupported claims.
74. Sickened by a woman who always talked about the outsiders who did not know God. Read internet info on beginnings. Started to see that scripture didn’t fit 2×2 theology.
75. I left because I found through reading information online that the gospel/teachings of the 2X2’s is false according to the Bible. I heard and believed the true gospel of God’s grace and free gift of salvation from reading my Bible and studying other Christian teachers online. I also began to attend a church before I left meetings and realized what I had once believed was just a lie. I then could no longer fellowship with the friends and workers so I left with my four children before any of them professed.
76. I have not left the truth and never will because there is no other way. The true early Christian church met in homes. The early church had itinerant preachers. The early church did not build physical churches. God dwells in the heart not in a building. There is no other way that these things are evident. I have seen Jesus in this way and know with all my heart soul and mind that there is nothing that will shake the true church of God. I hope the person conducting this research goes and listens to the workers preach, and doesn’t sit on the side line criticizing the workers with information they have received from discouraged ex believers who left because they were bitter. I pray for you.
77. Even though I grew up in a family where every member professed and many of my family members had meetings in their homes, I never felt like I fit in. I was always a tomboy growing up and the criticism I experienced for simply being who I was enough to dissuade me from ever professing. growing up I always hating going to meeting and being around the friends because I felt like I was constantly being judged and criticized and I felt like the only way I could ever fit in and be a “good professing woman” would be to change every aspect of who I was as a person. I always hated the way women in the truth were subjected to an entirely separate set of rules that were much harsher than the rules that dictated men’s lives and I felt that it was quite telling that the older brothers were constantly harping on the women. I had always had every intention of leaving the truth as soon as I was able to financially support myself.
The strongest motivations for disaffiliation (Surveyed 2013):
I felt that church doctrine was wrong
I felt lied to when I found out about the origins of the church
I felt like I was pretending or living a lie
I witnessed harm done by the Workers or Friends
I realized I only believed because it was what I was taught or what was expected of me
This survey/thesis was created in partial fulfillment of the requirements for a Masters’ degree in Sociology at the University of Kentucky by Julene L. Jones.
Qualtrics Survey open from December 20, 2012 to February 20, 2013
LINK to thesis: https://scholars.uky.edu/en/publications/motivations-for-disaffiliation-from-the-two-by-two-sect/