Putting your head in a noose (professing) is quicker and easier than pulling it out.
1) I was born and raised in meetings. My parents had the workers’ address in our city, and my father was an elder for many years. When I professed in my late teens, it was on the condition that the Workers accepted that I did not believe the church was the only ‘right church’ or way to heaven. They did, although maybe they thought I would change!
I enjoyed doing many of the things that others around me never did, whether it was Sport, Music, Entertainment and other events. Increasingly, I viewed the church, not as a way of life, but simply as “a” church, and not “the” church. In my twenties, a visit from the overseer at the time resulted in me vowing to myself, that no man would ever control what I did, and had, in my own house.
2) For many years, most of our connections and friends were outside the church. This was by choice. Friends are who you chose, not who are handpicked for you in a group to choose from.
3) If we ever left, we were not going to be losing a sense of community.
4) My wife and I knew very little of the Child Sexual Abuse (CSA) issues through the years, as it had been expertly buried, apart from one or two isolated cases. We even had abusers stay in our parents’ houses, but I am sure that not even our parents knew their past. In one case, I believe they were deliberately misled. In answer to a question about why one was sent back from India, they were told he was too argumentative. That was probably true, but his behaviour later in life suggested he was probably sent back for other reasons.
Once at a Convention, I was asked to go to a celebrity Worker’s room and discuss the idea of him writing to me. I was in my late teens, probably, but I got a very uneasy feeling about it, and declined. Nothing happened, or was suggested. But I now know that he has been red-boxed as a Sexual Offender.
5) We became quite disgruntled in the late 1990s due to the new generation of workers coming through that seemed to be theologically illiterate, and as a result, their preaching was never spiritual food, for us anyway. In general, it was about feeding the confirmation bias of the laity that it was the only and right way. The Ministry preached itself, more than its purpose.
6) We had known about the deceit regarding the beginnings of the church by William Irvine since the mid-1980s, but parked it. Bought The Secret Sect. The word down here was, ‘Burn it—it is the only light you’ll get from it.’ We learned of the Living Witness Doctrine’s inception, but parked it. We learned of the deceit surrounding the 1987 edition of Hymns Old and New, but parked it. However, I personally did not relate to the general tone of many of the hymns, and their deceptive reference to the church as being ‘The Truth’.
We learned of the lies told about why certain workers were in our country, either returned from India or Sri Lanka, or visiting from Greece. But we parked them.
7) We learned that the myth of the church being as one, the whole world over, was a sham. Vis a vis the doctrine of the Trinity, doctrine of exclusivity, rules on divorce and remarriage, rules for women’s dress, alcohol, sports etc. I parked that, and simply focused on the Sunday morning meeting
8) I had done the math for a worldwide scenario, and determined that the facade of being a penniless ministry was false. I didn’t doubt that some young workers did it hard, but that was because of those above them. I parked that.
9) We found that we could get more from a Charles Swindoll sermon of 20 minutes on YouTube, than a whole day of Special Meetings. We still attended, but the more we did, the more it validated what we had experienced, by listening to others. This also seemed to prove the point in (5). It then begged the question of, “Why?”
10) We used to have mid-week, and Sunday night “subject meetings,” but they had turned into a ritualistic series of monologues by people paraphrasing the verses they read. So we parked that and didn’t attend.
11) The Gospel as being preached in the Gospel Missions, was not about Jesus. It was about the 2X2 Ministry, and the misinterpretation of Matthew 10, (which was rescinded after a few weeks, Luke 22). For example, one Mission was opened with the Hymn of ‘Jesus Only is our Message’. It was the only time in the whole hour that his name was mentioned. The subliminal message in that is that the church and the Ministry become the proxy Jesus. With considerable time needed to attend, because of where we live, we no longer attended. From what we heard, we didn’t miss anything.
12) Many years ago, we attended a Convention where Willis Propp was speaking. I had heard what he was up to, from my contacts in the US and Europe, so decided to not attend that meeting. I got bawled out by a number of people for not attending and ‘honouring the sacrifice of God’s anointed.’
13) Along came Bruergate, and the floodgates opened. I said then, that as bad as it was, the reaction of the friends, workers and the Ministry as a whole will tell an even bigger story, as has been proven.
13) The revelation of a senior worker in the UK being a serial paedophile came to light, and with it the knowledge that all those around him knew. They even had a nickname for his actions. And with that came the news that those overseers were also offenders, enablers, or had girlfriends on the side, that they kept hidden.
14) Through all this we kept our focus on attending the Sunday morning meeting, but then there was a Special Meeting, and we knew there were a number of people there who were hurting. Nothing was said about the troubles. Just as nothing had been said at a convention six months earlier, even though one chap mentioned it in his testimony.
15) We then heard people say that it should all be left in God’s hands, and it wasn’t up to anyone to stop offenders attending, even though they stood a girl down for wearing earrings, around the same time. And to top it all, a website was put up, but designed to not be found (no SEO) in order to try and fool the Australian Commission and the Friends regarding admission to the Australian redress scheme. A shadowy Advisory Group was formed, but around half of them left it, some in disgust when they realised it was a sham, I am told.
16) We couldn’t park things on the shelf any longer. And when it became increasingly obvious that the Sunday morning meeting is owned by the system, and will support it no matter what, the shelf starts to tip.
You can’t lean on the shovel and pray for a hole. You can’t just read and pray bad doctrine away, or behaviour that is so immoral, that it earns jail sentences. It hadn’t worked since 1897 and was never going to start working. Doing the same things over and over, but hoping for a different result is lunacy, and so it has proven.
17) We left the Summer of 2024 after Special Meetings, and while not easy, it was a relief to be honest. And since then, so much more has been revealed that validates our decision. I have met with a number of victims, here and overseas now, and their stories are horrific. And so too, are the cover-ups, denials and the general behaviour of people that I should have been able to look up to, and who should know better.
18) Bitter? No. At peace? Yes. Disappointed? Yes, at being subjected to deceit, and even our parents and possibly some workers being deceived. And desperately sorry for the victims of sexual, spiritual and emotional abuse. When I heard of an older Sister worker telling her companion to “get out while you can, I can’t, it’s too late and I have nowhere to go”, it pains me. Thank goodness for Bridges and Balm. And when I hear of a lady in her 80s hearing of the FBI investigation, doing some research and realising she has been lied to all her life, and leaving, it pains me to think of what she went through.
19) The stories of people who had Elderships and Convention Grounds being treated like dirt by the Ministry because they stood up for honesty, accountability, and transparency is more validation of our decision. (A number of these are in face to face interviews on YouTube)
I feel so much for these people who are going through so much hurt, that I cannot stand by and not be a support to them in some way.
I don’t think this is a definition of bitterness. If this helps just one person join the dots and have the scales fall from their eyes, or help them have the courage to act on what they already know, then writing this will have been worthwhile.
Pragmatic
March 11, 2026
New Zealand