To our many friends and family;
First, we sincerely apologize for how long this letter has become. We encourage you to take your time but do read the whole thing eventually since it’s interwoven with our experience, awakening to truths we weren’t aware of and the growing of our faith.
We have loved this way of fellowship. It is the only one we’ve ever known—the way we were born into, raised in, and spent our entire lives committed to. Our hearts have long been knitted to the people and the ministry, and that love remains. But in light of recent events that have deeply troubled our spirits, we were compelled to search the Scriptures like never before. What we found there gave us clarity, conviction, and ultimately, peace. It also propelled us to be honest with ourselves.
The Bible is clear: evil is not to be ignored, justified, or hidden—it is to be exposed, repented of, and removed. Yet, what has come to light is not only the presence of evil but its long-standing protection and perpetuation, along with a tragic refusal to change. Because we love truth, and because we earnestly seek the peace of God that passes all understanding, we have come to understand that for us, peace means leaving this way of fellowship.
Our decision to step away is not driven by bitterness or unforgiveness. It has come through prayer, tears, and deep soul-searching. At its core, it’s about feeling out of balance and not being honest with ourselves and God, being guided by the Holy Spirit and setting healthy boundaries as we follow Jesus. We’ve come to understand that true forgiveness doesn’t mean staying silent in the face of harm, nor does it require remaining in a system that continues to overlook and minimize the suffering of the vulnerable.
We still carry love in our hearts—for the people, the memories, and even the good that once was. But we also carry a growing conviction that we cannot align ourselves with what no longer reflects the heart of Christ. As Micah 6:8 reminds us, “What does the Lord require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.”
For us, this means choosing not to ignore what is wrong. It means showing mercy by letting go of resentment and trusting God with the rest. And it means walking humbly by surrendering our need for approval and instead following where truth leads—even when it’s hard. We have learned that God asks hard things of us sometimes. This is not an act of rebellion. It’s simply the next faithful step in our journey with Jesus.
And by no means do we judge anyone who chooses to stay. We know how complex, emotional, and deeply personal this journey is. Everyone walks at their own pace and according to their own convictions. Our prayer is simply that all of us continue seeking Jesus, the One who is full of grace and truth. Wherever He leads each of us, may it be toward healing, freedom, and deeper fellowship with Him.
As a trauma survivor, Rhonda has learned that setting boundaries and protecting her spiritual and emotional well-being are essential to survival. We are following God’s promptings and leadings and have read so many verses that resonate with our current situation in this church. Proverbs 4:23 (ESV)
“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”
We can seek peace, but we aren’t required to remain in toxic situations or unjust situations to prove we’ve forgiven. Romans 12:18 (NIV)
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
God gave us a clear message when this all began: Silence IS complicity.
When devastating news first surfaced about Dean Bruer two years ago, we—like so many—were stunned. The betrayal felt incomprehensible. But for Rhonda, a survivor of child sexual abuse, it was more than news—it was trauma relived. A horrific wound, reopened. And with it, thousands of other Survivors across our fellowship were retraumatized, their pain triggered by the weight of what had been hidden and perpetuated for far too long.
But what made it even more unbearable was the betrayal by our ministry—those we were taught to trust as the spiritual shepherds of our souls. The silence. The minimizing. The lack of urgency or transparency. For many of us, that betrayal cut even deeper than the crime itself. Because it wasn’t just a failure to protect—it was a failure to care.
What’s even more chilling is this: if it hadn’t been for three courageous women—who grew up in this church and refused to stay silent—the truth about Dean Bruer would still be hidden. It wasn’t the ministry that brought this into the light. It was Survivors. It was laypeople. It was the desperate push of those who could no longer bear the weight of secrets.
If those brave women hadn’t forced the hand of Oregon’s Overseer by threatening to let people know if he didn’t, we would all still be living in the dark. And, if the lady who took a photo –of the very private letter that was not to be given out to anyone but just read in a few meetings –and hadn’t shared it, we would still be totally in the dark. Parents would continue opening their homes in trust, completely unaware that the ministers they welcomed might pose a danger to their children. In other words—children would still be getting molested. And worse, all while the illusion of holiness remained intact. It’s also very alarming that most people want to stay in the dark about these problems so children are still at risk.
That is the terrifying truth.
Because within the ministry, a different gospel had taken root—one of silence, submission, and self-preservation. A learned script passed down through generations: No matter how horrific the sin, stay quiet. Protect the system. Submit to authority. Don’t rock the boat—and you’ll survive.
But at what cost?
How many children have been sacrificed on the altar of institutional image? How many souls silenced, shamed, or shattered—simply because exposing darkness was seen as more dangerous than the darkness itself?
That reality is bone-chilling.
What followed was not a reaction born of anger or impulse—it was a divine prompting. Not a hair-brained idea, but a clear calling from God. He laid it on Rhonda’s heart to create a space where Survivors could finally be heard. Truly heard. Not silenced. Not managed. Not pitied. Heard.
That calling gave birth to Bridging the Gap on CSA, a monthly online gathering where raw truth meets real transparency. A sacred space where stories aren’t just shared—they’re honored. Where brave voices rise from the shadows into the light. Where education, Scripture, and sometimes uncomfortable truths are brought into the open.
From the beginning, the mission was clear: tell the truth, be transparent and hopefully transformation will happen within the church, protecting children. Shine light into the darkness that has gripped our fellowship for far too long. Build a culture where empathy replaces silence, where justice is not negotiable but essential, and where true transformation becomes possible. We believe conflict can be resolved. Generational abuse can be confronted. And healing can begin—when truth is no longer buried.
“Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” (Ephesians 5:11)
What has become evident is this: the problem is not just a few individual acts of abuse—it is the deeply embedded systems of secrecy, denial, and control that have allowed those heinous acts to continue unchallenged and perpetuated for decades.
We never expected perfection. But we did expect integrity from our ministry and to practice what they claim to believe in–the Holy Bible.
Instead, we witnessed deflection. Silence. Stonewalling. And, tragically, a discovery of a another form of abuse: spiritual abuse.
When survivors courageously came forward, we hoped to see a leadership broken in humility and true repentance. What we encountered instead, was a defense of image over integrity, of systems over souls. A “do nothing and this will go away like it always has in the past” mentality.
How Did We Get Here?
As we encountered pushback and resistance from leadership—every level unwilling to implement transformative Safe Church policies—we were left asking: Why? That question birthed an eight-part video series in August 2024 on our Bridging the GAP on CSA monthly online meetings. In it, we began to trace the historical roots of this fellowship, diving deep into archived letters, journals, and the tireless research of faithful truth-seekers like Cheri Kropp-Ehrig. What we uncovered was sobering. The seeds of today’s dysfunction were planted long ago—often with good intentions, but without the humility to acknowledge or correct error when it surfaced. Over time, protecting the image of the “one true way” became more important than upholding honesty, integrity, or a holy hatred of evil. Instead, it was consistently covered up. Victims were threatened to silence or accused of lying and so forth.
We do not share this lightly. Our purpose is not to divide, but to awaken. Not to accuse, but to tell the truth in love—a truth that, as Scripture promises, will either set you free or convict your conscience. As Jesus said in John 8:32, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” We trust in that promise, even as we carry hearts that have been breaking for nearly two years now—for the children, for the coverups, and for a church that still refuses to weep, lament, repent, and change.
When We Reached Out
In August 2023, Rhonda personally reached out to Overseers—across the United States and internationally—with a simple invitation: “Come and listen. We have a conflict, and resolution will come through honest communication.”
We hoped that hearing survivors directly would stir compassion. That it would lead to repentance, to accountability, to action and change. And for a moment, it seemed possible. Several Overseers attended that first Zoom call. A flicker of hope.
But by the second meeting, fewer came. Then—none.
It wasn’t that the stories stopped or that the pain became less real. It was that leadership chose not to participate.
Meanwhile, the stories multiplied.
As of today, there’s almost 5,000 survivors who have contacted the 800#. Some are in their 90s. Think about that.
- Survivors retraumatized. Diseases and pain magnified.
- Advocacy dismissed as rebellion, unforgiveness and bitterness.
- Convention ground owners pressured into silence.
- Victim/Survivors continued to be silenced, threatened and blamed.
- Private investigators ignored.
- Workers engaging in sexual relationships while publicly preaching celibacy.
- And over 1,000 perpetrator allegations now under review, most of which will never reach justice.
“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the door of the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces.” (Matthew 23:13)
When the Fruit Reveals the Root
As more testimonies emerged—each more heartbreaking than the last—it became impossible to dismiss the patterns. This wasn’t just a few “bad apples.” This was a culture that protected power, silenced truth, and punished those who dared to ask hard questions or tell their stories. Pedophiles were secretly moved around even from country to country, more kids harmed and nobody was warned to protect their kids.
In fact, the workers were accomplices to crimes in helping other workers escape the law and from being held accountable.
“There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known. What you have said in the dark will be heard in the daylight, and what you have whispered in the ear in the inner rooms will be proclaimed from the roofs.” — Luke 12:2–3 (NIV)
The deeper we advocated, the more God opened our eyes to other systemic problems:
Excuses for very bad behavior made with the rhetorical statement we have all heard many times, “the way is perfect, the people aren’t.”
- Gaslighting framed as “spiritual leadership.”
- Silence encouraged under the guise of unity.
- Victims told to be quiet and not to “cause division.”
- Honest Workers who dared advocate, quietly and quickly removed.
- Survivors/Advocates labeled as bitter, unforgiving and having the “wrong spirit.”
The Ministry
Our hearts carry a deep sadness for the workers—those who have dedicated their entire lives to this ministry. Many entered with sincere hearts, a desire to serve God, and a willingness to give up everything for what they believed was a higher calling. Most have no formal education or financial safety net. Having taken a lifelong vow of celibacy, they live entirely dependent on the system that sustains them. For decades, this way of life has been upheld as noble and untouchable. But behind that veil is a painful truth: this structure, while appearing sacrificial, has also created a culture of silence, fear, and deep dependence.
We do not view most of these workers as malicious. In many cases, they are victims of the very system they now uphold. The pressure to conform, to protect the image, and to obey leadership without question has created an environment where complicity becomes survival. Those who dared to advocate for victims—who spoke out for truth and justice—were swiftly removed, isolated, or silenced. To speak out, they risk losing everything—literally.
As we continued to advocate for survivors and press for transparency, some workers began to come forward and share their stories with us. What we heard was heartbreaking. Beneath the surface of loyalty and obedience is a deep undercurrent of emotional and spiritual abuse—control masked as unity, manipulation disguised as humility, fear paraded as faithfulness. Many workers carry wounds of shame, loneliness, and confusion, never having had the freedom to process their own trauma, much less support someone else’s.
In time, we came to understand: the pushback we experienced wasn’t about preserving doctrine—it was about preserving control. Scripture was twisted to prop up an unbiblical priesthood—a ministry that teaches and believes they are the only true way to salvation. And because they believe that, the image of “the way” must be protected at all costs. It must be kept blameless, even if that means concealing grievous sins. As a result, heinous crimes against the innocent and vulnerable have been covered up and hidden from us for decades, all to preserve a system that has mistaken control for righteousness.
And as much as we grieve for the workers, we must also acknowledge our own role in the brokenness. We are not without culpability. For generations, we’ve idolized the ministry—honoring their sacrifice to “go forth freely” and carry the Gospel without earthly attachments. We admired their obedience to the rules of not getting to marry and subsequent celibacy and the relinquishing of personal hopes, dreams, and the joys of family life. We gave them our very best when they visited. We spoke of them with reverence. And in doing so, we helped create a culture of untouchability—where questioning the “anointed ones” was equated with spiritual rebellion.
When red flags surfaced, we silenced our own discernment. We told ourselves not to judge. We learned to fit in—to adapt to a culture that discouraged healthy accountability in the name of spiritual humility. Over time, we, too, became part of the silence. We honored the structure more than we honored the truth. And for that, we deeply repent.
Today, we are quietly helping several displaced sister workers who now find themselves on the verge of homelessness and without any income. Their courage to speak has cost them everything—housing, purpose, identity, and community. So we understand why so few speak up. The cost is staggering.
We hold no personal judgment—only a deep longing for healing, and a prayer that truth, compassion, and courage will someday meet in a way that sets both the captives and the keepers free.
There can be no peace without truth. Any attempt to manufacture peace without first confronting the truth is not peace at all—it’s a counterfeit. It’s the kind of false peace the prophets warned against when they said, “They dress the wound of my people as though it were not serious. ‘Peace, peace,’ they say, when there is no peace” (Jeremiah 6:14).
True peace—the kind that reflects the heart of God—is not passive. It doesn’t look away from injustice. It doesn’t ignore wounds, silence pain, or hide sin under a polished surface. God’s peace begins with truth. “The Lord detests lying lips, but He delights in people who are trustworthy” (Proverbs 12:22). To pursue peace while suppressing truth is to abandon the very foundation of biblical righteousness.
Jesus said clearly, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free” (John 8:32). Freedom and peace cannot come through denial or deception. They come through light. Through confession. Through repentance. “But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light” (Ephesians 5:13).
Truth is not optional in the Bible. It is foundational—woven through every command, covenant, and calling.
Here’s what Scripture shows us:
God Is Truth
- “God is not a man, that he should lie…” — Numbers 23:19
- “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” — John 14:6
God doesn’t just speak truth—He is truth. That means truth isn’t a concept we can manipulate; it’s a Person we are called to follow.
Truth Is Required for Worship and Relationship
- “God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.” — John 4:24
- You cannot claim to know or love God while rejecting truth.
Lying and Deception Are Condemned
- “You shall not bear false witness…” — Exodus 20:16
- “The devil… does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him… he is a liar and the father of lies.” — John 8:44
To distort truth is to align with the enemy, not with God.
Truth Is What Sets Us Free
- “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” — John 8:32
- Healing, transformation, and salvation hinge on the acknowledgment of truth—no matter how uncomfortable.
Followers of Christ Are Called to Walk in Truth
- “Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor…” — Ephesians 4:25
- “Buy the truth and do not sell it…” — Proverbs 23:23
Truth isn’t optional—it’s a non-negotiable part of discipleship and maturity in Christ.
If the church wants true peace—a peace that heals, restores, and reflects Christ—it must start by telling the truth. Not just in word, but in action. Justice and righteousness are the foundation of His throne (Psalm 89:14), and without those, any peace we claim is built on sand.
So yes—there can be no peace without truth. Because Jesus Himself is the Truth (John 14:6). And any path that avoids Him, avoids peace altogether.
A Safe Church—In Name Only
In late 2023, Galen and a team of dedicated friends in Texas spent months drafting and refining a Child Sexual Abuse (CSA) Policy—working diligently to make it clear, compassionate, protective, and easy to understand. They collaborated closely with the Worker overseeing the process, and the final version was published on the TX/NM Mighty App.
But a policy on paper means nothing without action.
Galen followed up, urging the Worker to begin training sessions to ensure the policy was not only understood but implemented. The Worker declined, saying it wasn’t necessary.
And then—silence.
No training. No Elder meetings. No communication.
Even after we offered to host education sessions ourselves—using our own home and time—our requests were declined. All the effort poured into making the policy accessible and practical was dismissed.
It became just another document—collecting dust, offering no real protection.
Worse still, the content of the policy itself revealed deeper, systemic issues:
- Deacons and advocates selected by the very system under investigation.
- No separation between spiritual authority and victim advocacy.
- Alleged abusers quietly welcomed back into fellowship—while victims remained retraumatized, unsupported, and ignored.
- Being a Survivor, I wouldn’t call a random number to talk to a stranger about my abuse.
- Galen called one of the numbers twice and there was no answer nor did anyone call him back. He left a message about needing to report perpetrators because the workers wouldn’t respond to Cynthia Liles, the Private Investigator who had emailed the Overseer the warning. She then contacted Galen for help.
At Texarkana 2024, a well-known perpetrator from another state attended the convention. He was not removed. And sadly, this isn’t an isolated incident. We are aware of several situations where leadership in TX/NM—despite being the only area to implement a Safe Church policy—failed to follow the very guidelines they put in place.
When leadership is asked questions about these incidents, they deny knowing anything about it. They pretend ignorance on many things, often.
It has become increasingly clear that, despite public claims that Texas/New Mexico has “the one and only” Safe Church Policy, this has created a false sense of security. While the existence of a written policy may sound reassuring, a policy without consistent action, training, enforcement, and accountability is nothing more than words on paper. Survivors remain unprotected, perpetrators remain unchecked, and the illusion of safety continues—while real change is avoided.
Discerning Actions
Our assigned Bible studies this year have centered on the book of Numbers—a series of chapters that focus heavily on rebellion against Moses: the murmuring of the people in the wilderness, the sedition of Miriam and Aaron, and the chilling account of Korah’s uprising against God’s appointed leadership. As we read and re-read these stories, something began to stir within us. It felt less like a study—and more like a warning. The selection of these particular passages didn’t feel coincidental. It felt calculated.
The unspoken message was clear: “Challenging authority is dangerous.” Especially when that authority is cloaked in spiritual language and claims to be anointed by God—regardless of its actions, its failures, or its fruit.
That suspicion was heartbreakingly confirmed when we received a letter from the Workers this past week. Written in the familiar cadence of “Worker-speak”—gentle on the surface but heavy with veiled judgment—it was laced with subtle manipulation and unmistakable spiritual gaslighting. It referenced Numbers. It reinforced obedience and submission to the hierarchy. And beneath its polished tone was one loud, resounding message: “Don’t ask questions.”
But if we cannot ask questions in the house of God—where truth, righteousness, and humility should reign—then where can we?
When we read the letter we knew, without a doubt that they were weaponizing Scripture and our refusal to acknowledge the obvious, broke. Not our faith—but our illusion. We realized we really could no longer trust this ministry which had been blatantly revealing that to us, for over a year and a half. Not because we have turned away from God, but because we have turned toward Him—toward truth, toward accountability, and toward the kind of integrity that God’s Word demands from those who claim to lead in His name.
Throughout our life, We’ve prayed—almost daily—for discernment. During this experience we’ve specifically asked for the Holy Spirit to help us discern truth from falsehoods. Not just for clarity about what we were seeing, but for wisdom to separate truth from tradition, righteousness from religious control, and God’s voice from human manipulation. We believe with all our hearts that those prayers were heard. This awakening—the lifting of the veil—was not born out of rebellion, but out of a desperate desire to follow Jesus more closely, more honestly, and more freely.
God is not threatened by honest questions. Jesus never silenced sincere seekers.
If anything, Scripture shows us again and again that true spiritual authority invites scrutiny, because it is anchored in honesty and humility, not hierarchy.
And so, we ponder:
- What kind of leadership refuses to be questioned?
- And what kind of God would expect us to follow it blindly when it doesn’t align with what the Bible teaches?
- What kind of person perpetuates perpetrators who harm children and expects everyone to forgive it and forbear it without accountability?
Shifting Ground
Over the past two years, we’ve watched the landscape shift dramatically. Survivors have bravely found their voices. Advocates have risen with holy boldness. And thousands have quietly stepped away—hearts weary from the silence, the coverups, and the persistent refusal to acknowledge or address the harm. But we’ve also witnessed the painful cost of truth-telling: shunning, removal from meetings, and the quiet exile of faithful individuals—many of whom were pillars in the fellowship—for daring to question authority. Even workers have been discarded for simply speaking the truth, regardless of age, health, or ability to provide for themselves.
As we’ve searched our hearts, we’ve also looked back. And in doing so, we began to see more clearly. There were many times in years past when we didn’t fully agree with things that were said or done—either by the ministry or by those within the fellowship. But we chalked it up to human imperfection. Small errors. Flawed people doing their best. And we reasoned that we could live with those things, because no one is perfect, including us.
But the longer we advocated, the more painful the truth became. This wasn’t about minor missteps. This was about devastating crimes—covered up, minimized, and ignored. This was about spiritual pride so entrenched that those in positions of highest authority—the Overseers—refused to take responsibility, refused to repent, and instead continued protecting the system at the expense of the innocent. And all of the workers learned to stay silent even when they knew in their hearts and minds that what was going on was wrong.
Think about this.
Dean Bruer committed heinous, criminal acts—violating sister workers and abusing children. These weren’t rumors. These were realities. Many within the ministry knew about what he had done to our workers. Still, when he died, a large public funeral was held in his honor. Over a thousand people attended—both in person and online. They praised him. They idolized him. They spoke of his legacy with affection, reverence, and denial. As if the truth didn’t matter. As if the victims didn’t exist.
Realizing the hypocrisy broke something in us. It’s surreal. It’s beyond comprehension. This is not forgiveness and forbearance, this is super sick.
It pushed us beyond the point of explanation. Beyond the point of trying to reason or reconcile what we witnessed. After much prayer, honest reflection, and undeniable prompting from our Heavenly Father, we’ve made the decision to step away from hosting traditional, ministry-sanctioned meetings in our home.
This is not rebellion.
This is reverence—for Jesus Christ, the Way, the Truth, and the Life. We follow Him. Not a religion. Not a ministry. And not a culture that silences truth in order to preserve appearances.
As we have searched Scripture and prayed earnestly for the Holy Spirit to reveal the truth in it, we’ve been able to acknowledge the truth about many things we had quietly questioned for years. Just one example: Matthew 10 describes a mission trip that lasted only about two months—after which the Apostles, including those who were married, returned to their homes. It was never intended to be a lifelong vow of separation. And yet, our ministry has built an entire model around celibacy and permanent detachment from family—something Scripture actually warns against. And these instructions were replaced with John 20, The Great Commission. They didn’t always go two and two, and many times there was more than two together.
Here’s another example. In 1 Timothy 4:1,3, celibacy as a requirement for ministry is called exactly what it is: “a doctrine of devils.”
But that was only the beginning of our awakening.
As we continued studying the New Testament, more questions surfaced—questions we had carried silently for much of our lives because we were conditioned NOT to question:
- Why don’t we follow what Scripture clearly teaches about praying for the sick and anointing them with oil (James 5)?
- Why is there no mention of deliverance, something central to Jesus’ ministry and the early church? Jesus actually cast out demons two thirds more than he healed people.
- Why are the gifts of the Spirit, the mutual edification of the Body, and the full expression of the Christian life often dismissed, minimized, or replaced by tradition?
- Why do we rarely hear about many parts of the Bible but often hear about a few select passages?
We came to realize that many of the beliefs we were taught were built on descriptive accounts of the early New Testament church—narratives of what happened—not prescriptive commands of what must happen for all time.
Here’s just a few prescriptive commands the Bible gives us:
- Love your neighbor. “And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself… Mt. 22:39-40
- Love the Lord. “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.” Mt. 22:37 KJV
- Receive God’s power which comes after redemption. “And, behold, I send the promise of my Father upon you…until ye be endured with power from on high.” Luke 24:49
Another pattern we began to notice in hindsight was the constant emphasis on works—external appearances, meeting attendance, obedience to the ministry—while grace was rarely mentioned, much less deeply understood. Though Scripture teaches that we are saved by grace through faith—not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8–9)—the culture we were immersed in often left us feeling that acceptance with God was tied to performance.
We were taught to keep our focus away from the finished work of the Cross and the New Covenant and keep it on our own human effort. The beauty of the Gospel—that Jesus paid it all—was overshadowed by fear of falling short. Discovering the true depth of God’s grace has been one of the most healing parts of this journey. It’s not a license to live carelessly—it’s an invitation to live freely, rooted in love, not fear. God’s grace gives us the desire to become holy, more faithful and closer to Him.
We used to brush off those questions as personal curiosities—minor concerns compared to the bigger picture. But now we see they were signals—gentle nudges from the Holy Spirit—revealing how far we had drifted from the fullness of Christ.
Jesus told us plainly, “By their fruits you will know them.” And we are experiencing the fruits of this ministry firsthand. While many claim to be “Spirit-led,” we know this with certainty: the Holy Spirit will never lead anyone to act in ways that contradict the Word of God.
And so, we walk forward—not in fear, not in bitterness, but in truth. With eyes wide open, hearts anchored in Christ, and a growing hunger to live the faith the Bible actually teaches—not just the one we inherited.
Our door remains open. Our hearts remain tender. And our devotion to Christ is more unshakable than ever. In fact, this journey—though painful—has only drawn us closer to Him. Through every disappointment, every heartbreak, and every moment of disillusionment, we’ve clung to the unchanging truth that with God, all things are possible. He has sustained us, refined us, and deepened our faith in ways we never imagined.
We have strived—sincerely and patiently—for truth, transparency, and transformation within this fellowship. But now, we’ve come to a solemn realization: to continue participating feels like complicity. And we cannot. God is not calling us into isolation—He is calling us into something deeper, freer, and undeniably real.
We assure you, we are not deceived. We are liberated—by the truth that has set us free from bondage to a system that demands loyalty but rejects accountability. We no longer place our trust in a ministry. We place it in Christ alone.
Advocacy
As part of this broader effort to bring healing and restoration:
- Rhonda created private groups on Facebook, where survivors and advocates can connect, share, and support one another without pushback:
- With the help of dedicated volunteers, we launched a website to preserve the truth about this event, offer education, encouragement, resources, exit letters and commentary, and house our video recordings: BridgingTheGapOnCSA.com
Announcement:
In Summer 2026, we plan to host a public healing conference in Dallas, Texas, bringing together speakers, survivors and advocates, and a Support Village showcasing nonprofits and ministries that offer trauma healing and financial assistance to those affected. This event will be open across all faith communities.
If you would like to attend or volunteer, please email us directly with the subject line: BTG Conference 2026.
The Bottom Line: We Will All Be Held Accountable
If real change is going to happen within this fellowship, it must start with us. The culture of fear—fear of asking hard questions, fear of speaking up, fear of challenging spiritual authority, fear of retaliation—has to be broken.
We can no longer protect comfort at the expense of truth. We’ve seen too much. And once you’ve seen, you can’t unsee. The spirit of fear is not from God.
Which leads us to ask—where is the outcry?
Why aren’t we witnessing a groundswell of Elders and Workers from every corner of the world standing up and calling for truth, justice, and transparency? Why are the voices of Survivors still met with silence—or worse, suspicion? Why is accountability so threatening?
Tragically, many who have dared to speak out or ask questions have paid a high price:
- Shunned by their spiritual family and in some cases, their immediate family.
- Stripped of meetings in their homes.
- Cast out of ministry roles.
- Labeled as “rebellious,” “divisive,” or “not having the right spirit” and much more.
This isn’t just disappointing—it’s dangerous. And it reveals just how deeply this culture has protected power over people and judgement over love.
As was spoken about Archbishop Justin Welby when stepping down after the mishandling of abuse cases in the Church of England:
“There are circumstances in which something happens whereby a person in a position of prominent leadership essentially loses the trust and the confidence… The pain in the victim community and the history of not listening to people… means that this is no longer a person who can carry the representative role of that office.”
There comes a time when remaining in leadership does not uphold righteousness—it perpetuates harm. When trust has been broken and accountability avoided, continued leadership becomes a stumbling block, not a service. Resignation, when done with humility and full acknowledgment of wrongdoing, is not weakness—it is the first step toward true repentance and the only path to restoration.
If trust is gone—and for many, it is—then healing requires new leadership, humility, and a renewed commitment to truth, transparency and transformation.
God has brought these things to light for a reason. Let us not bury them again.
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7, NKJV)
We were never called to silence in the face of injustice. We were called to courage, compassion, and truth. These actions uphold the spirit of power and of love with a sound mind.
Truth – Trauma is a Life Sentence
For the past few months, we’ve watched with heavy hearts as the Overseers have doubled down—not in support of the vulnerable, but in protection of the perpetrators. We’ve seen genuine efforts to establish meaningful CSA policies dismissed. Pleas from Survivors have been ignored, even as they witness their abusers welcomed back into fellowship meetings around the world. This actually causes retraumatization once again. And so, like many others over the past two years, we feel the Spirit has confirmed for us that: it’s time to let go.
Please know: we are not leaving you. We are leaving the meetings. Our door remains open. Our hearts remain soft. Our love for each of you is unchanged.
We walk forward now in obedience to God—because His Word is clear. Scripture is filled with commands to speak up, defend the vulnerable, and pursue justice. One of the clearest comes from Proverbs 31:8–9:
“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.”
God has encouraged us through His Word many times when we were criticized, disdained and ridiculed for standing up for Survivors. This has often come to our minds:
“To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:
A time to love, And a time to hate; A time of war, And a time of peace.”
— Ecclesiastes 3:1, 8 (NKJV)
The phrase “a time of war” refers not only to physical conflict but, in a broader and spiritual sense, to moments when standing up, speaking out, and resisting evil is necessary and righteous.
This passage powerfully reminds us that there are divinely appointed seasons—some for peace, and some for righteous confrontation.
One of the most heartbreaking realizations in our journey has been recognizing that the essential ingredient of the Christian faith—repentance—has gone missing from the leadership of our fellowship. Jesus said it plainly: “Except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish” (Luke 13:3). And yet, among those who should model humility and brokenness before God, there is instead silence, deflection, and control. They talk among themselves, but they fail to address the congregation en mass asking for our forgiveness and repenting from their egregious sins.
Satan appears as an Angel of light and his goal is to deceive us. I believe that repentance doctrine has been substituted by tolerance even in our church. Why? Because repentance confronts sin. Tolerance softens it, redefines it or denies it. Tolerance is a feel-good-in-the-moment deception that will never liberate anyone. It’s a substitute for repentance that gives the illusion that no one needs to change.
Why is repentance avoided? It calls leaders, perpetrators and followers alike to bow low before a holy God, to acknowledge wrong, and to walk away from self-righteousness and pride. But tolerance? Tolerance offers a feel-good deception—an illusion that no one needs to change, that things can go on as they are, that good intentions are enough. After all, as one Overseer stated, “All men are liars.’” (Psalm 116:11, NKJV) As if making that statement excused their behavior.
But making excuses and tolerating sin among themselves does not liberate.
Only repentance does.
Repentance is not shame-based or cruel—it is the path to true freedom. It requires an honest assessment of one’s life against the unchanging standards of God. It invites humility, truth, and surrender. And in return, it offers something radical: a record wiped clean. As Ezekiel 18:21–22 promises:
“If the wicked will turn from all his sins… and do that which is lawful and right, he shall surely live, he shall not die. All his transgressions… shall not be mentioned unto him.”
What could be more beautiful than that?
When leadership fails publicly, repentance must also be public. This is not about shaming—it’s about restoring integrity, healing broken trust, and honoring the God who sees all. In Scripture, God consistently called not just individuals, but entire communities and their leaders to corporate repentance. When sin affected the people, so did the call to acknowledge it openly.
In Joel 1:13–14, the priests—those in spiritual authority—were commanded:
“Put on sackcloth, you priests, and mourn; wail, you who minister before the altar… declare a holy fast, call a sacred assembly… cry out to the Lord.”
When King Josiah discovered that Israel had strayed from God’s law, he didn’t cover it up or excuse the past—he tore his robes in sorrow (2 Kings 22:11), gathered the people, and publicly committed to repentance and reform (2 Kings 23:1–3).
In the New Testament, James 5:16 instructs,
“Confess your faults one to another, and pray for one another, that ye may be healed.”
Healing requires honesty. Accountability is not optional—it is the pathway to restoration.
And when leaders sin against the body, especially in ways that enable harm, private apologies are not enough. The wound was public. The silence was public. The betrayal was public. So the repentance must be public as well.
And yet, our leaders—those charged with shepherding the flock—refuse to walk this road. When abuse is exposed, they opt for secrecy rather than sorrow. When victims cry out, they offer silence instead of repentance. When called to account, they preserve the system.
It grieves us deeply, because we believe in the power of repentance—not just for personal salvation, but for communal restoration. Without it, there is no revival. No reconciliation. No redemption. Just polished appearances and unhealed wounds.
We are not calling for humiliation—we are calling for humility. We are not demanding punishment—we are pleading for truth, sorrow, and acknowledgment.
Without public accountability, there can be no trust.
Without repentance, there can be no revival.
And without truth, there can be no healing and no peace.
May God raise up voices of truth, humility and repentance. May He break through the hardness of pride with the kindness that leads to repentance (Romans 2:4). And may we, as His people, never settle for tolerance when what we need is transformation so that not one more child is harmed amongst us.
In Closing
As we continue advocating for truth, transparency, and transformation, God has opened the door to rich and beautiful fellowship—with many who’ve also left the 2×2 system, and even with those we were conditioned to label as “worldly.” What we’ve found are Spirit-filled, Christ-loving believers who are walking in truth, freedom, and grace.
To our dear Survivor community: we hear you, we believe you, we love you, and we will never stop advocating for you.
To the advocates and whistleblowers who are standing in the fire: stay encouraged and stay engaged. You are seen, appreciated, and desperately needed.
Remember, together, we are making a difference.
To those still inside the fellowship—especially those quietly wrestling with questions—we want you to know–we see you. We were you. And we know how painful it is to even entertain the idea that something might be wrong. But this is not about tearing down faith—it’s about building it on the solid foundation of Jesus Christ alone.
As the Bible states, we encourage you to test everything (1 Thessalonians 5:21). Ask the hard questions. The same Holy Spirit who revealed truth to us will guide you, too—because God is not the author of confusion but of peace (1 Corinthians 14:33).
And to those of you who find all of this hard to comprehend—that’s okay. It takes time to process truth that shakes the foundation. But be brave. Take time to prayerfully and personally explore the real stories of Survivors who have courageously spoken out.
For years, we were told to stay off the internet—warned that it was full of lies, confusion, and spiritual danger. And so we did, believing we were protecting our faith by guarding our minds. But in time, we came to see that this warning wasn’t about guarding truth—it was about guarding control. It was a way to shield us from discovering the very real, very painful truths that have been hidden for decades. By keeping us in the dark, we were encouraged to keep trusting, to keep believing this was “the one true way,” without question. But when we finally stepped outside the echo chamber and began to listen, to research, to pray—we discovered voices we weren’t meant to hear: the voices of Survivors, truth-tellers, and faithful believers who had seen what we were just beginning to see. And we could never unsee it again.
Their testimonies are not rumors—they are real, raw, and heartbreaking.
You can begin here:
bridgingthegaponcsa.com/awareness/personal-accounts/
Statistics (refer to the bottom of this document) say that between 92-97% of women are telling the truth about their story. As you read these personal accounts, choose one out of ten that you believe isn’t true. It will be one of the hardest tasks you’ve ever tried to do. We believe that among us, the truth tellers are a much higher percentage.
Reach out to those who have awakened to the calling of Christlike advocacy. This is the heart of Jesus. And remember the promise of James 1:5:
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.”
God gives discernment to those who sincerely ask for it. Don’t fear where that discernment may lead—it will always lead to Him.
For those who are lonely and confused, desiring fellowship but unable to attend meetings and so forth, explore our website for resources to help you and join our Bridging the GAP on CSA monthly meetings and you will find love, support, healing and community. And finally, remember this sobering truth:
- It can take 50+ years for a child sexual abuse victim to disclose what happened! In 2075, how old will you be?
- Over 99% of children are telling the truth! The time to listen—and act—is now. (refer to the facts at the bottom of this page)
Life has a way of placing us on roads we never imagined—where comfort collides with conviction, and where truth demands more than silent agreement.
Cognitive dissonance is not just unsettling—it’s heartbreaking. It’s the moment when we realize what we thought was godly may have been distorted, even weaponized. Awakening rarely happens all at once. It unfolds—through prayer, pain, Scripture, and the Spirit’s gentle voice. Then the grieving starts.
What once felt like betrayal has become a sacred invitation—not to walk away from faith, but to return to its source: Jesus Christ, the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6).
We never expected to be here. But we also never expected that pursuing truth would be the very path that set us free (John 8:32). And for that, we are grateful.
If you have questions, want to process, or feel called to get involved in helping others—please reach out to either of us. You are not alone.
With love and transparency,
Galen & Rhonda Grillo
April 8, 2025
[End of Exit Letter]
contact@bridgingthegaponcsa.com
Part 2 – Overview With References
Confronting Child Sexual Abuse and Lack of Accountability
The perpetuation of child sexual abuse within any religious organization is a grievous violation of trust and morality. The failure to hold perpetrators accountable, coupled with systemic cover-ups, secrecy, and the relocation of offenders, exacerbates the harm to survivors and undermines the foundational principles of the faith. Our efforts over the past twenty months to educate, provide platforms for survivors, and advocate for policies like the Safe Church Policy demonstrate our commitment to justice and healing.
The issues we are fighting against are deeply rooted in systemic harm, abuse, and negligence that have caused lasting damage to individuals, families, and communities.
These issues include:
- Child Sexual Abuse (CSA): This is the most devastating issue we are facing. The manipulation, exploitation, and abuse of vulnerable individuals, particularly children, by those in positions of trust, workers who stay in our homes, has been systematically covered up or ignored for decades. This not only violates the basic trust and safety that children deserve but also perpetuates lifelong trauma for victims. Survivors of CSA carry deep emotional and psychological scars that affect their personal well-being, relationships, and ability to heal. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Trauma
- Spiritual Abuse: Many have endured spiritual manipulation and control within our group, where workers have exploited their power to dominate, isolate, and diminish both followers in the past and survivors past and present who have found the courage to speak out. This abuse leaves deep emotional, psychological, and spiritual scars, as individuals are taught to continue to place their trust in the workers no matter how corrupt their behavior was, effectively undermining their personal relationship with God and eroding their sense of self-worth. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Spiritual+abuse
- Cover-Ups and Lack of Accountability: The Overseers and workers and some elders have consistently failed to address the abuses within our community transparently and responsibly. Instead of protecting the victims, leaders have focused on preserving the image of the institution, moving abusers from one area to another, and silencing victims through manipulation, shunning, and punishment. We’ve witnessed firsthand how the ongoing cover-up has allowed the abuse to continue unchecked for years, leaving a trail of broken lives and shattered trust. This failure to act has caused deep, lasting harm to our community, and the emotional scars will be felt for generations to come. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Accountability
- Legalism and Cultural Conformity: The focus has often been placed on outward behavior and rigid conformity to a set of rules, mostly man-made, in addition to encouraging a genuine, personal relationship with God. This culture of legalism created an environment of fear, shame, and guilt, where we were judged not by our hearts or true intentions, but by how well we adhered to external standards. Many have shared feelings as though our worth was tied solely to our ability to follow these rules, and any deviation was met with criticism or punishment. This constant pressure to conform left us spiritually exhausted, disconnected from God’s love, and struggling to understand the true message of the Gospel. Instead of experiencing grace, we found ourselves trapped in a cycle of feeling unworthy and never quite measuring up. As different workers came, new rules would be revealed. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Legalism
- Lack of Healing and Support for Survivors: As a survivor of abuse within this system, Rhonda knows firsthand the profound struggle of finding safe spaces to heal. For years, she carried a deep sense of isolation, shame, and confusion—trying to reconcile her pain with a community that never truly felt safe, yet one she tried her best to belong to. When she finally gathered the courage to confide in a few trusted individuals, her vulnerability was met with dismissal, minimization, or deafening silence—whether through ignorance or willful neglect.
The emotional and psychological scars she bears were often misunderstood, spiritualized away, or ignored entirely, leaving her to navigate the aftermath of trauma in painful loneliness and confusion. With no genuine support and no clear path toward restoration, she often questioned whether anyone could possibly understand the depth of what she had endured and gradually stuffed it deep into her existence which morphed into chronic pain and autoimmune diseases in which she has spent a lifetime enduring.
Like so many Survivors, Rhonda found herself internalizing the pain—believing, on some level, that she was to blame. This misplaced guilt and unresolved trauma began to take its toll, manifesting as chronic illness in varied forms including chronic joint and muscle pain and multiple autoimmune diseases. This is the hidden reality for countless others: when the church is silent, Survivors suffer in the shadows—and the damage compounds over time.
https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Support
- Systemic Harm and Institutionalized Oppression: At its core, this fight is about dismantling systems of oppression—whether spiritual, social, or institutional—that have caused deep and lasting harm to individuals and communities. The damage done by high-control religious systems reaches far beyond personal trauma; it extends across generations of individuals who were taught to unquestioningly submit to authority, to isolate themselves from healthy relationships outside the community, and to live in constant fear of judgment and rejection. For many, the scars of this conditioning are not just personal, but cultural, as they carry the weight of these beliefs for years, even decades, as they try to reclaim their lives and find healing. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=High+control
- The Need for Reform and True Repentance: One of the most crucial issues we are advocating for is the need for true accountability and repentance within the leadership. It is not enough for leaders to resign or be removed from positions of power; true healing can only occur when the institution acknowledges its role in the harm done, repents for its complicity in abuse and cover-ups, and commits to creating an environment of genuine safety, healing, and restoration for survivors. The Overseers generally refuse to do any of this. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Reform
- Sexual Abuse: As more Survivors have come forward, a devastating pattern has emerged: sexual abuse has not been limited to isolated incidents or a few rogue individuals. It has occurred within the ministry itself—perpetrated by those entrusted with the spiritual care of others—and also among workers and professing members, hidden behind a carefully maintained image of purity and devotion. These are not just lapses in morality—they are violations of trust, power, and sacred boundaries. In many cases, these abuses were not reported, not investigated, and not acknowledged publicly. Instead, they were quietly buried—with perpetrators quietly moved or restored while victims were left to carry the weight of the trauma alone. This is not righteousness. This is not holiness. This is systemic failure, and it has grieved the heart of God. For too long, the image of a “perfect way” has been elevated above the reality of systemic abuse in multiple ways—and that must change. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=sexual+abuse
The Reality
When we first felt compelled by God to advocate for Survivors, we were filled with hope and anticipation, believing that the process would be marked by cooperation, humility, and repentance—principles we had been taught by the ministry and rooted in Scripture. We envisioned a path forward where healing and restoration could take place, and where accountability would lead to true justice. But the injustices we are fighting against—those that have caused profound wounds in individuals, families, and communities—have proven more complex and entrenched than we ever anticipated. The road to healing remains long, and while we continue to stand together and stand for what is right, the reality is that, as Galen’s Texas policy account reveals, we have not yet succeeded. This failure only fuels our resolve to press on, seeking a future where justice, grace, and truth ultimately prevail.
Why Was Our History Hidden?
We have often wondered why the true history of our faith was hidden from us. It wasn’t until we stepped into advocacy and began asking hard questions—especially around the ministry’s refusal to change in the face of child sexual abuse—that we felt a deeper prompting from God: Ask. Seek. Look deeper. And so we did. We began researching, praying, and inviting the Holy Spirit to reveal the roots of this systemic failure.
What we found was both eye-opening and heartbreaking.
As we dug into the origins of the fellowship, we came to understand that while William Irvine may have genuinely been moved by God in the beginning, his movement was far from flawless. One of the most pivotal missteps was the adoption of the Living Witness Doctrine—a teaching that subtly shifted focus from Christ as the cornerstone to the ministry as the gatekeeper. From there, further distortions followed. Perhaps most damaging was the institutionalized teaching of mandatory celibacy, later introduced by other workers.
Scripture is not silent about such teachings. In 1 Timothy 4:1–5, Paul warns of a time when some would depart from the faith, “giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons… forbidding to marry.” It’s sobering to realize that what we once believed was a mark of holiness may, in fact, be a sign of deep spiritual error.
This doesn’t mean God wasn’t working—but it does mean man’s control slowly replaced Christ’s leadership, and over time, what may have begun with sincerity became entangled in pride, secrecy, and spiritual distortion.
For more details on the history watch our 8 part series, “Uncovering the Truth.”
Exclusivity Doctrine
The doctrine of exclusivism asserts that only one religious group possesses the absolute truth and holds the exclusive path to salvation. This belief has existed in various forms throughout Christian history, often leading to the idea that salvation can only be attained through a particular set of teachings and practices. This mindset breeds spiritual elitism, division, and a refusal to recognize God’s presence and truth in the broader Christian community. It marginalizes those outside the group and stunts genuine spiritual growth, leading to a narrow, unhealthy understanding of God’s love and grace. And as God’s family of Believers, it separates us and pits us against each other. We now feel that this deception was one of Satan’s greatest victories. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Exclusivity
Legalism
Legalism places an overemphasis on adhering to rules and regulations as the path to righteousness and favor with God. It often shifts the focus away from the core message of the Gospel—grace through faith in Jesus Christ—and fosters a mindset rooted in striving, not surrender. While it may look pious on the surface, legalism creates spiritual bondage, guilt, and a distorted view of God’s unconditional love and mercy. Historically, it has been used to maintain control within religious systems, but it comes at a steep price: the loss of joy, the suffocation of true faith, and the silencing of the Spirit’s work in individual hearts.
That said, works do matter. Scripture makes it clear that faith without works is dead (James 2:26). But works are the fruit of salvation, not the key to earning it. There’s a divine balance: we are saved by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8–9), but we’re also called to live out that faith through love, obedience, and service (Ephesians 2:10). When we understand this rightly, our good works flow from a place of gratitude, not guilt—of love, not fear.
As we walk away from doctrines that distorted this balance, we are learning to embrace the freedom that comes from a genuine relationship with God—one that is Spirit-led, not system-bound. It hasn’t been easy. The journey has been painful, filled with grief, loss, and countless moments of wrestling. But through it all, we’ve been drawn closer to the true heart of the Gospel—a heart that beats with grace, love, truth, and acceptance.
And from these ashes, beauty is rising.
Not because we finally got it right.
But because we finally let God—in His mercy—rewrite the story.
Experiences After Leaving
Most of our friends, when they leave, are shunned. We are well aware that we may lose most of our friends but we assure you:
- We are not lost.
- We are not bitter.
- We have not forsaken Christ—we are finally learning how to follow Him.
We invite you to keep fellowshipping with us, even if our paths now look different.
Please don’t let judgment replace relationship.
Please don’t let rhetoric harden your heart.
We ask you—pray for us as we continue praying for you, talk to us, ask us questions, and believe that Jesus is still at the center of our lives. Let’s not let man-made labels divide what love and understanding can still hold together.
- Let’s build bridges—not walls.
- Let’s choose grace over gossip.
- Let’s reflect the Jesus we all claim to serve.
And let us not forget the beauty of what Jesus actually accomplished. Through His death and resurrection, the New Covenant was established—a better covenant, written not on stone tablets, but on our hearts (Hebrews 8:10). We no longer need to submit to a human priesthood or a man-made system to access God. The veil was torn. We now have direct access to the Father through Jesus Christ, our perfect High Priest (Hebrews 4:14–16).
This covenant is not based on external performance, but on internal transformation through the Holy Spirit. It frees us from legalism while empowering us to walk in love, truth, and holiness—not to earn salvation, but as a response to it.
This is the foundation we stand on. Not a ministry. Not a method. But Christ alone.
A Call to Continued Fellowship
Our deepest desire is to maintain genuine friendships and spiritual fellowship—even after our departure—because our commitment to embodying Christ’s love remains unchanged. Though this path has brought grief and loss, it has also deepened our relationship with Jesus, moving us toward a faith that is more mature, resilient, and rooted in truth.
We wholeheartedly encourage others to follow Jesus—regardless of denominational affiliation—because the Gospel was never meant to be exclusive. It is transformative, inclusive, and powerful, calling people from every background into a living relationship with Christ. To truly live out our faith is to prioritize love over labels, grace over legalism, and unity over division—trusting in the power of Christ to work in every heart, in every setting, as He sees fit.
We invite you to explore our website, created under the leading of the Holy Spirit, as a space committed to Truth, Transparency, and Transformation. It’s more than information—it’s a support hub for Survivors, Advocates, and Believers navigating the journey out of spiritual abuse and into deeper fellowship with God. Whether you’ve left, are contemplating leaving, or are simply asking questions, this space was built for you.
Our prayer is that every believer would return to the core teachings of Jesus—to advocate for justice, speak truth in love, pursue righteousness, and cultivate fellowship that honors God rather than elevating people. As we work to expose harmful doctrines, confront systemic issues, and build authentic relationships, we do so not in pride—but in humility, fully aware that any courage or compassion we show comes from God alone.
May your walk with Christ continue to deepen.
May it bring you peace, boldness, and a clearer vision of His love and purpose for your life. And may we all become more like Him—not in form, but in truth, grace, and Spirit-filled power.
Part 3 – Going a little deeper into our journey…….
Every time we tried to shorten this, it got longer! We apologize for the length of this document but feel that it may encourage some who dare read the whole thing.
We never expected perfection from our church, but the depth of corruption we have witnessed has left us profoundly shocked and disillusioned. The reasons for our decision to leave are both numerous and undeniable. Our Overseers have consistently failed to show repentance, offer genuine apologies, or take responsibility for their actions, all while resisting the implementation of vital Safe Church Policies. Despite our hope that the culture could change to ensure children’s safety, we have watched as every effort to adopt such policies has been ignored. We now believe the refusal to implement these policies is tied to financial and legal concerns, with church leadership unwilling to take the necessary steps due to the potential legal implications and fear of the impact on the institution’s finances and refusal to face the consequences of their egregious crimes including being accomplices to the crimes of those they were responsible for moving around.
We were further troubled by the removal of a brother worker who spoke truth about grace at conventions, a decision that silenced much-needed honesty and transparency. Another brother worker was removed because he attended a church service with a potential convert and commented positively on what he had heard. We were further troubled by how the workers who had the integrity and honesty to take a stand and speak their truth about these egregious acts, were treated, condemned and or booted out.
Over the years, we didn’t always agree with everything we saw or heard, but we still found moments of spiritual nourishment. We appreciated the simplicity, the humility, and the closeness of a spiritual family. For a long time, we believed in what we thought the fellowship represented.
But over time, as we witnessed significant shifts within the church—like one worker openly stating in the 1990s, “Our responsibility is to keep the sheep in the fold now”—and as we learned more about the Living Witness Doctrine (a doctrine that caused some of the workers to leave during its imposition in the early days), God began to reveal truths we could no longer ignore. That doctrine, which teaches that salvation can only be accessed through a professing worker, is the root of why many in the 2×2 system believe they are the only ones going to heaven—just like other high-control religious groups. It elevates man above the message and creates exclusivity where Christ offered invitation.
The more honest we were with ourselves, the more we saw that the foundation was not built solely on Christ—but on silence, control, and self-preservation. We began to understand that remaining in this system meant complicity. It became clear that God was not asking us to stay loyal to a ministry. He was asking us to be loyal to Jesus.
The final shift came after hearing the recording from the Washington Worker Meeting in June 2024—a meeting that should shake every heart awake. We’re grateful to the courageous sister worker who recorded and shared it, even though she was swiftly silenced and placed on resting status. In this system, transparency is a threat. (Trigger Warning: Listen here)
We’ve also heard startling testimony, like this story from the Listening Tour in Dallas:
Who Is Innocent Among Us?
If you are willing to face the truth, this is a good place to start.
We’ve come to believe that letting go has become an act of faithful obedience. The longer we remained, the more we saw the ministry ignore Survivors, protect abusers, and reject transparency in the name of peace and forgiveness—without accountability or justice. And that is not the Gospel.
When God called us to walk away, it was not easy. But it was clear.
There is a difference between leaving a structure that places itself between us and God, and walking more closely with the Savior who tore the veil.
What we’ve discovered on the other side has been a blessing we never expected:
- Fellowship with others who were once labeled “worldly,” yet who walk deeply with Jesus.
- Conversations rich with Scripture, healing, and humility.
- Peace—not from being “in” the right group, but from being rooted in Christ alone.
- Worship that lifts up Jesus—not a method, not a ministry, but our beloved Redeemer.
We were once taught that truth was only found inside “the circle.” But Jesus never built circles—He broke them. He ate with outcasts. He healed outsiders. He was accused by religious leaders of having “the wrong spirit.” He still is.
“Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.” — 2 Corinthians 3:17
God has encouraged us to follow Jesus—not humankind. And He has led us into fellowship with other Believers, regardless of denominational affiliation. This aligns with the inclusive, transforming message of the Gospel—a Gospel that prioritizes love over legalism, grace over gatekeeping, and Christ over culture.
We do not judge anyone who chooses to remain in the fellowship. We love you, no matter where you are on your journey. This experience has been multi-faceted, difficult, and mind-blowing—a true exercise in faith and trust. But we believe there is freedom in Christ, and He is calling His people to walk in truth, justice, humility, and grace.
As we continue addressing systemic issues—particularly around child sexual abuse and doctrinal error—we do so not out of bitterness, but from a deep desire for spiritual integrity and obedience to God’s Word.
We’re not just stepping away from what no longer aligns—we’re stepping into something far greater: Life in Christ. Fellowship with truth-tellers. Healing with the brokenhearted. And worship that honors the One who sets captives free. We were taught that truth was only found inside this fellowship creating an exclusive circle of the only ones that have hope. But Jesus never built circles—He broke them. He ate with outcasts. He healed outsiders. He was accused by religious leaders of having the “wrong spirit,” as well.
“Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.” (2 Corinthians 3:17)
We Don’t Expect You to Understand Immediately
If this is hard for you to process, that’s okay. We understand. For decades, we were conditioned to believe that questioning the workers meant rebelling against God. That speaking up meant losing our place in heaven. That leaving meant we had “lost out.”
But here’s the truth: God has not lost us. In fact, He’s been walking with us every step of the way—guiding, refining, and healing. What we’ve gained in this journey is clarity, courage, and a deeper experience of grace.
And if you’ve ever silently wondered, “Is there more to this?” — we’re here to say: Yes. There is. There’s more than religious conformity. There’s freedom. There’s truth. There’s Jesus. And His burden is light.
When Trauma Is Dismissed, the Church Is Complicit
One of the most heartbreaking truths we’ve come to accept is this:
Survivors were not just failed by individuals—they were failed by a system. A ministry that, since its experimental beginnings under William Irvine in 1897, has slowly been shaped and solidified by layers of human control, unspoken and spoken rules, and a culture of obedience to the ministry.
It became:
- A system that elevated loyalty over love.
- A system that protected the illusion of righteousness rather than pursuing true justice.
- A system that taught people to suffer quietly so others could remain comfortable.
We’ve listened to the voices of Survivors—some who waited decades to speak, only to be told they were “confused,” “bitter,” or had “the wrong spirit.” Others were retraumatized through forced silence, subtle shunning, or outright rejection. Some were even forced to apologize to their Overseer-abuser, pressured by other Overseers to confess to lying—when they were actually telling the truth. And most recently, several victims have asked that the perpetrator be removed from meetings, the workers refused.
Many internalized the pain, believing the abuse was their fault or that God had abandoned them.
We now understand what trauma truly does. It doesn’t simply fade away with time. It lodges deep within the body, the mind, and the spirit. It rewires a person’s brain, impacting their entire experience of safety, identity, and faith. There are many resources available that explain this—The Body Keeps the Score is one we strongly recommend. You can find more on our Resources page on our website.
These are not isolated wounds. They are generational scars.
And the ripple effects are vast including:
- Broken families.
- Spiritual disconnection.
- Chronic illness and/or pain rooted in unresolved trauma.
- Cycles of shame, anxiety, addiction, and despair.
This is why written policies, no matter how well-worded, are not enough.
- We don’t need more documents—we need courage.
- We need healing communities, not damage control.
We need spiritual leaders who stop protecting the institution and start protecting the people Jesus died for.
Because until there is repentance—true, Spirit-born repentance—there cannot be healing.
- Not shallow apologies.
- Not strategic resignations.
- Repentance. Not from Survivors who in the past few months are being accused of being unforgiving and need to repent from this behavior according to what’s been spoken by workers, but from perpetrators and their accomplices as well as anyone else who is guilty of being complicit to these egregious acts of sin.
“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart—these, O God, You will not despise.” (Psalm 51:17)
An Even Sadder Aspect
One of the most heartbreaking consequences of the abuse and betrayal within this system is seeing how many Survivors have walked away from faith altogether. Some now identify as agnostic or atheist—not because they never loved God, but because those who claimed to represent Him caused deep, soul-wounding harm. Many are angry, disillusioned, and yes—bitter. And we understand why. When trust is shattered in the very place that was meant to offer safety, it can feel impossible to separate the abuser from the God they claimed to serve. Our hearts grieve deeply for these dear ones—not in judgment, but in sorrow and solidarity. We believe their bitterness is not the root, but the scar tissue of betrayal. And we continue to pray that, in time, they will encounter the true Jesus—gentle, just, and full of grace—the One who was with them all along, even in their pain. In the meantime our hearts are comforted by that poem, “Footprints in The Sand.” Jesus is carrying them as they work through all of this.
Read this article that explains why spiritual betrayal causes separation from God:
What Accountability Actually Requires
True accountability begins with taking ownership—not just for what was done, but for what was allowed. It requires humility from those who may not have committed the abuse themselves but who upheld the silence, enabled the cover-ups, and protected the system over the people.
Accountability does not mean blaming a few “bad actors” while absolving the dysfunctional culture that empowered them. It means listening without defensiveness, stepping down when trust is broken, and creating structures where Survivors—not institutions or offenders—are centered and protected.
It means telling the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable.
It means letting truth lead, even if it takes us to places we never thought we’d go.
This is what we longed to see and believed would happen.
References to Overseers: https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=overseers
When Ashes Give Way to Beauty
In our monthly zoom meetings we often return to the comforting promise of Isaiah:
“He gives beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness…” (Isaiah 61:3)
And somehow, out of all this heartbreak—something beautiful is rising.
We are closer to Jesus than we have ever been. Our faith has increased beyond belief. We clearly are spoken to by the Holy Spirit often. No longer bound by fear, silence, or man-made structures, we’re experiencing a relationship with Him that is deeply personal, Holy Spirit-led, and saturated with grace. We’ve found fellowship with others who walk humbly, love generously, and actually live out the Gospel—not just talk about it.
We’ve also found the courage to chat about uncomfortable topics and questions on our zoom meetings we once didn’t dare bring up:
- Why was the true history of our faith kept hidden?
- Why was exclusivity–The Living Witness Doctrine–adopted early on?
- Why was obedience to a ministry elevated above devotion to Christ?
- Why was celibacy enforced in the middle of the 1900’s when there had been no less than fifty married couples in the ministry?
- And why did we all, unknowingly, commit the sin of idolatry by placing workers on a pedestal?
As we studied the early roots of the fellowship—through letters, archives, and historical records—we saw how doctrines like the Living Witness Doctrine and enforced celibacy distorted what may have begun with sincerity. Over time, what started as a desire to serve God morphed into a system of control. The longer we stayed, the clearer it became: this is not what Jesus meant when He said, “Follow Me.”
Paul’s warning in 1 Timothy 4:1–3 hit us hard:
“Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith… forbidding to marry, and commanding to abstain from foods which God created…”
And Jesus’ words in Matthew 23—a rebuke of religious leaders who burdened others while exalting themselves—ring louder now than ever.
Could it be that Scripture has been twisted—taken out of context to justify doctrines that keep people bound in fear, obedience to the ministry and silence? This letter would become a book if I mentioned them all. For more details watch our “Uncovering The Truth” videos on the website.
We’ve all heard or said the accusations against those who leave:
- “They lost out.”
- “They weren’t childlike.”
- “They couldn’t forgive.”
- “They got caught up in deception.”
- “They’re just bitter.”
But those phrases aren’t just dismissive—they’re spiritually damaging. They are the language of modern-day Pharisees, meant to preserve a false sense of safety inside the group and to alienate those who’ve stepped away.
But here’s the real question:
What if those who left weren’t walking away from Christ—but finally learning how to walk with Him?
The rhetorical common phrase, “The way is perfect, but the people aren’t,” has been repeated like a shield to protect the system. But if a “way” produces silence in the face of abuse to children, defends the powerful while shaming the wounded, and demands loyalty over love—is it really perfect?
Jesus didn’t call us to defend a way.
He called us to follow Him.
For a humorous view on leaving Phariseeism read Rhonda’s personal story:
Spiritual Abuse
One of the most difficult parts of this journey has been coming to terms with something we never knew existed: we were spiritually abused.
At first, those words felt too harsh… too dramatic. But as we began listening to others, digging into Scripture, and learning about the patterns of high-control religious systems, the pieces began to fall into place.
- The fear-based obedience and submission to man-made rules.
- The manipulation disguised as humility.
- The shame used to control behavior.
- The subtle pressure to conform or risk losing everything—community, spiritual identity, even our place in God’s family.
It’s hard to describe the feeling of betrayal when the blinders come off. When you realize that the very people you trusted with your soul—who spoke in soft voices and quoted Scripture—were unknowingly part of a system that coerced, silenced, and spiritually gaslit its members. It feels like grief. And in many ways, it is. You’re grieving what you thought was true. You’re grieving the years you spent striving to please God through man-made expectations. You’re grieving the version of faith that now feels like a falsehood.
We’ve spoken to many others walking through this same awakening, and their words echo our own:
- “I thought it was just me.”
- “I thought I was the problem.”
- “I didn’t know spiritual abuse was a real thing.”
But it is real. We were just indoctrinated to believe that we “had a wrong spirit” if we doubted or questioned anything. And the effects run deep—especially when God’s name was used to justify control, dismiss pain, or enforce silence. It makes it harder to trust. Harder to pray. Harder to know who or what is safe.
But here’s what we’re learning: Jesus was never the one who hurt us.
He was always the One calling us out. The One whispering, “This isn’t Me.”
The One waiting to rebuild what others misrepresented.
If you’re beginning to feel the cracks in the system… if you’re questioning and feeling afraid—you are not alone. What you’re sensing may not be rebellion. It may be revelation.
And that is the beginning of healing.
How to Recognize Spiritual Abuse—and Begin Healing in Christ
Spiritual abuse is often hard to identify—especially when it’s all you’ve ever known. It rarely looks like abuse at first. It’s subtle. Polished. Often wrapped in Scripture and religious language (worker-speak) that makes it feel holy. But here are some signs we and many others have come to recognize:
- Questioning is discouraged or punished.
- Obedience to leadership is prioritized over personal relationship with God.
- Fear, shame, or guilt are used to control decisions.
- You are told to avoid “outside influences” or teachings—even if they are biblical.
- You’re made to feel spiritually inferior for expressing doubt, emotion, or struggle.
- The system is always protected. The victims rarely are.
- You are led to believe salvation depends on remaining loyal to a specific group or method.
- People who leave are spoken of with disdain, judgment, or pity.
The first time we realized that there was spiritual abuse was a texting conversation with a worker after Rhonda told her survivor story at a Listening Tour. You can read it here:
If you’ve experienced any of this, please know: you are not crazy. You are not alone. And you are not losing your faith—you may be finally finding it.
Healing from spiritual abuse takes time. It involves unlearning distorted views of God, detangling truth from tradition, and rebuilding trust—not just in people, but in Jesus Himself. It often includes grief. Anger. Relief. And a hundred other emotions that hit like waves. https://bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=spiritual+abuse
But healing also brings freedom.
Here’s what we’ve discovered along the way:
- Jesus is not disappointed in your questions. He welcomes them.
- God’s voice never manipulates or controls. It convicts with love and leads with peace.
- You don’t need a ministry to access God. You already have Jesus—your perfect High Priest (Hebrews 4:14–16).
- Grace is not dangerous. It’s the foundation of the Gospel.
- TRUTH does not fear questioning.
The road out of spiritual abuse may feel lonely at times, but you are not alone. There’s a growing community of believers—like you—who are waking up, breaking free, and rediscovering the joy of walking with Christ in spirit and in truth.
We’ve compiled helpful tools, Scriptures, and support on our site to guide you through this process.
bridgingthegaponcsa.com/resources
And if you’re hurting, confused, or just want someone to talk to—we’re here for you.
Jesus never called you to serve a system. He called you to walk with Him.
And He’s still walking with you now.
An Invitation to Walk Forward Together
Our hope is not to divide—but to invite.
We long for continued friendship and spiritual fellowship with those we love, even if our paths now look different. We hold no judgment. Only a deep belief that God’s family is far larger than we were ever taught, and that His Spirit is moving in ways that stretch beyond the borders of our former understanding.
There is more.
More than a meeting.
More than a ministry.
More than a method.
There is freedom.
There is healing.
There is deliverance.
There is prayer for the sick, and anointing with oil.
There is confessing our trespasses to one another and bearing one another’s burdens.
There is baptism by fire, and grace that is truly sufficient.
These aren’t fragments of theology—they’re living realities found in Jesus Christ, and they’re available to all who seek Him. Not through a structure. Not through a system. But through Him.
If you’re still sorting through the questions—unsure of what’s true or what comes next—we understand. We’ve been there. It’s not easy to walk away from what’s familiar, even when your heart begins to stir. Take your time. Ask the hard questions. Cry out to God. And know this: you are not alone.
This road may be hard, but it is holy. And it will require a kind of faith you may never have had to use before.
But God’s grace is more than enough.
And His Holy Spirit will begin to speak—not through fear or pressure, but through gentle truth, peace, and unmistakable presence.
Not in a structure. Not in a method. Not in an institution. But in Jesus.
We’ve gathered many resources to help support you on your journey. You can search words on our website and you’ll find much help and encouragement:bridgingthegaponcsa.com/?s=Grace
What Now?
If you’re still sorting through it all—unsure of what’s true or what comes next—we understand. We’ve been there. Take your time. Ask your questions. And know that you’re not alone. It’s a long and difficult journey that takes faith like you’ve never had before. God’s grace is sufficient and His Holy Spirit will begin to speak to you more noticeably.
If this all feels too heavy to face right now:
Start where you are. Let the stories speak. Let Scripture guide you. Ask God to lead you. Truth can withstand scrutiny. We were all lied to. The stories are true. They just kept it hidden from us.
“Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good.” (Romans 12:9, NKJV)
If you’d like to talk, ask questions, or get involved, we welcome your heart and your voice.
With deep gratitude to our Heavenly Father and Advocate Jesus Christ,
Galen & Rhonda Grillo
contact@bridgingthegaponcsa.com
A POEM written after almost one year of advocating for survivors in this fellowship, just after the first anniversary of what is now dubbed, “Bruergate.”
It describes what it’s been like to be an advocate.
April – May 2024
I’m Just a Survivor Advocating in the Heat of Abhorring Evil
I’m a Survivor I am told
Yet when I speak oh so bold
They do not hear me in this fold
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing to see, just let us be
We trust our leaders & they disagree
I shout, I cry, I plead, I wail
All of this to no avail
I gather the wounded, those in despair
I give them a voice together to share
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing is wrong
Says the throng
We trust our leaders
They are real feeders
I pray, I mourn, I read and weep
Somebody has to protect the sheep
The children’s innocence to keep
What else to do, I pray so deep
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing to see, just let us be
We trust our leaders & they disagree
Story after story, year after year
Victims abused; it is very clear
I teach, I preach, I write and shout
Heard by a few brave souls, without doubt
Who awaken to the truth so bold
And don’t go back to sleep or do what they are told
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing to see, not at all
Everything’s sweet
Except for a few discontent sheep
I’m just a discontent rebel stirring up trouble
Sowing discord I am told
If you’re so unhappy, just leave the fold
By their silence, they loudly say:
There’s nothing to hear; let’s just be clear
We’re satisfied in men, Whose works are amiss
Because they approve of our submissiveness
I beg, I plea, and now I can’t sleep
For I fear for all the sheep
I was hurt by the perps; they refuse to see
My life will never again the same to be
By their silence, they loudly say:
Blind as can be
Unwilling to see reality
We march faithfully on
Quiet down, you noisy con
Just leave, others say
Why do you stay?
Why don’t you just walk away?
If I do, then more lambs will pay!
By their silence, they continue to say:
It doesn’t affect me or my family
Why should we care, honestly?
We don’t see our own apathy
We go along the Way happily
If I leave so easy to say
Who will protect them from being prey?
If I stop and just move on
How many more will they slay?
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing to see, just let us be
We trust our leaders & they disagree
Just pray, they say, Have faith in God
He will take care of it; don’t be so odd
God called me loud and clear
His voice so near and dear
He reminded me of a song we sang
While growing up on Big Sky Lane
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing to see, not at all
Everything’s great; stand tall
There’s no concern, do not weep
for a few discontent sheep
“There were many giants in the days of Saul
But a little stripling far outshined them all
Just a little pebble and a little sling
From the hand of David made God’s people sing”
There’s nothing to do, so shame on you
Stirring up trouble for our poor Shepherd’s too
You’re to blame for wrong focus
And the stories are mostly bogus
Forgive and forget like you were taught
All this whining is wrong and it must stop
“Shamgar had an ox goad, David had a sling,
Dorcas had a needle, Rahab had a string;
Samson had a jawbone, Moses had a rod,
Mary had some ointment, All were used by God”
So I know I am not a fraud
I, too, am being used by God
Even though like Jonah, I ran at first
Trying to escape that voice that burst
In my head night and day
Until I turned and obeyed
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing to do
Not a care in the world
We are strong in our delusion
Let us remain in our illusion
I want to quit, leave the crowd
But God’s voice is still so loud
Please, I say, it’s hard on me
Nobody cares so why should we?
By their actions, they continue to say:
There’s nothing wrong here, Not at all
All is normal as Convention draws near
We honor our Shepherds we hold so dear
Discouragement and exhaustion dissipate
As I think of the children’s fate, I must march on before it’s too late
And one more abusive event for a child awaits
A life of trauma, their purity robbed
Again, I think of this and sob
By their silence, they loudly say:
Nothing is wrong, as we sing our songs
We sing, we pray, we speak so strong
No remorse, no sackcloth & ashes
Neither tears to wet their lashes
No restitution, avoiding responsibility
Life goes on, normal as can be
You’re the problem again they say
Why won’t you just go away?
Leave us alone, let us be
You’re the liar, not we
I do not understand how this can be
This betrayal I clearly see
Really makes me want to flee
Trust shattered I did not foresee
By their silence, they loudly say:
Who are you to us the crew
a woman after all should not pursue
Why should we listen? Why should we care?
They say I judge but I won’t nudge
This is about crimes decades long
I’ll keep writing and singing my song
By their silence, they continue to say:
You’ve gone too far, why did you dare?
An unsubmissive woman is rare!
You aren’t God and you’re very flawed
Don’t you know we’re above the law
Go away, you nagging flea
We will never bend a knee
The mental toll is quite a weight
My will, my strength in low estate
Being the enemy because I speak truth
Is something new I did not choose
By their silence, they continue to say:
Children harmed, don’t be alarmed
There’s nothing to see, we guarantee
Our leaders know, they are pro
There’s nothing to show
They wouldn’t go so low
Get thee below, It was long ago
Don’t be so slow, You refuse to grow
It just would be too big a blow
Moral values have decayed
Not just in the world but in this Way
Like the emperor with no clothes
Can’t see their pride that God so loathes
Part with wealth, we propose
Abusing children that God’s exposed
By their silence, they continue to say:
We are anointed they claim
much to their own shame and fame
We do no wrong we’re where we belong
On our throne above the throng
This is not a forgiveness issue
It’s crimes you will not admit to
Nor is it me judging you
It’s complicity to known felonies
It’s being accomplices to heinous acts
Against innocent children, who trusted you
To do the right thing and stop the sicko’s
By their silence, they continue to say:
Children harmed, don’t be alarmed
It may have happened but maybe not
Who knows what’s true, we didn’t get caught
The anointed upon our thrones
Do not upon us cast your stones
Jesus said you’d know us by our fruit
Ours is sweet, do not dispute
The damage is done, you cannot run
It’s too late to change your fate
The law of consequence, may I hint
Will prevail, no matter if you bail
By their silence, they loudly say:
Blind as can be
Unwilling to see reality
We march faithfully on
Quiet down, you noisy con
We cried; we tried to wake you up
You would not budge, oh so corrupt
It’s time for us to be set free
A time to kill so we can heal
But pride prevailed; you could not relate
Like Eli’s sons, you are done
Judgment has been released
Your power and pride will decrease
By their silence they continue to say:
All is well; do not tell
Our leaders know best
We leave them the rest
Before you, we came in God’s name
To tell our story, oh so gory
You blamed, you shamed, you wore us out
You said we were dishonest
To our truth, we even had doubt
You told us it was our imagination
Our voices silenced, we faced humiliation
We were told it was God we had failed
And then some of the victims bailed
You forced us to apologize to the perpetrators
And we lied before our Creator
We said sorry, in person, for slandering his good name
Bowing our heads in deep shame
You shouted at us in doubt, with all your mighty clout
And accused us of destroying God’s good Kingdom
Solidifying that forever more we would be Victims
We whimpered, we wailed, and then some bailed
But your stubborn indignation prevailed
You crossed the line; you did too much
God’s wrath has come, you to touch
Now you beg, you plead, you squirm, and you flee
But the time has come, and God is done
There’s nothing new under the sun
Denial is reality, silence is complicity
Willful ignorance, take no chance
Apathy is our circumstance
Woe to you, noisy one
We can’t wait until you’re done
Not a chance, I reply
To these crimes, I won’t comply
You can accuse, and you can abuse
My urgency will not diffuse
Wake up this time, there’s no truce
and join the fight, With all your might
Because I’m on God’s side, and He is right
By their actions, they continue to say:
All is well, do not tell
We deduce there’s no excuse
For us to join your troops
Seducing us to be your recruits
You’re the problem, you’re the one
You should forgive, and then we’ll be done
Focus on Jesus; do not displease us
Questioning our actions is egregious
Thousands of sheep are fleeing the fold
5th generation pillars, elders so bold
They can’t support a ministry
Unrepentant, defiant, and leaving debris
Some write exit letters explaining their plight
No misunderstandings, just the reason for their flight
And you say it’s God purging his kingdom
From the weak sheep, unwilling to overcome
Satan’s tactics, deceit and staying in the battle
They’ve lost out, you claim, fell off the saddle
Blinded in your minds, your conscience seared
Claiming mercy on sinners – it’s just so weird
But not holding them accountable for their crimes
Sneaking them around, above the law, so divine
More lives shattered; their lives don’t matter
No policies, no guidelines, nothing will change
Abuse will continue; it’s all so very strange
You’ve always claimed to be led by the Spirit
But we are to discern if it is of God
The Bible clearly defines the true merit
Of the Holy Spirit and that of a fraud
You’ve been deceived by the wrong spirit
And you can’t see it, so oblivious
I don’t know why, It’s blatantly obvious
Jesus warned there’d be wolves among us
Pretending to be Shepherds
Who truly care for the flock
It’s all just such an undeniable shock
I believe it started with the doctrine of demons
When your ministry decreed that celibacy
It was a new rule with much relevancy
But in reality was a setup for failure
Because Satan deceived you with much pleasure
The spirit you are led by, I can’t deny
It is just fine with the carnage
And perpetuating all the garbage
The damage is done; you can’t run
It’s too late to change your fate
The law of consequence will prevail
Even if you cry and wail
May God’s mercy be your choice
As before His throne you rejoice
It is not our wish for you to face an abyss
“Vengeance is mine,” saith the Lord of might
Repentance will bring you to the light
No more can I fight
Much to your delight
You’ve made it clear
Change is not near
It’s time for me to leave it be, nothing left for me
I will now seek peace and rest in God’s care
As I support those whose lives have been shattered
Helping them pick up the pieces all tattered
Sharing with them that their stories are believed
Empathy, kindness, and safety achieved
Helping hearts heal in this tremendous betrayal
Comfort, grace, and God’s love portrayal
You are the priests
Who passed by the victims
Unaffected, unashamed
Stripped of their dignity
Half dead and mentally beat
You are the accomplices to the robbers
Pretending to be bible scholars
Hide your eyes, there’s nothing to see
Stripped the children of dignity
Sentenced to a life of trauma
And way too much drama
You support Perpetrators, hold them dear
Place them with children way too near
Even though 98% of them will never change
Your support of creeps is so very strange
And 9 out of 10 women are telling the truth
About the heinous crime that happened in their youth
Nothing to see here, just a wall—
Built with silence, cloaked in thrall.
But truth still knocks, though voices stall…
May God spare you, once and for all.
May He break what pride has built so tall,
So mercy can rise, and justice call.
By Rhonda Grillo
Statistics on Child Sexual Abuse Everyone Should Know
(This information was shared with the Overseers in Rhonda’s second letter to them)
- 99% of children tell the truth about abuse. Even in the rare instances when child victims do disclose abuse, disclosures are often ineffective.
- While exact percentages may vary across studies, research indicates that false allegations of child sexual abuse are rare. A study analyzing 136 cases of sexual assault reported to a major Northeastern university over a 10-year period found that the percentage of false allegations was low. [1]
- Over 90% of women are telling the truth (Adult false reports range between 2% and 8%).
- Methodologically rigorous research estimates that false reporting rates for sexual assault cases are between 2% and 8%. [2]
- It’s estimated that 86% of child sexual abuse goes unreported altogether. Very few victims actually come forward and tell their story or sue their perpetrators. Usually, it’s too late because of the laws.
- Many instances of child sexual abuse are never reported to authorities, making it challenging to determine exact figures. However, studies consistently show that a significant percentage of child sexual abuse cases go unreported. [3] [4]
- Only 6% of the abusers are actually convicted when they are challenged because it is so hard to prove.
- According to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN), out of every 1,000 sexual assaults, only 25 perpetrators will be incarcerated, indicating that a small percentage of abusers are convicted. [5]
- Talking about their experience is so hard on the victim/survivor that they relive their trauma and its perpetuating damage.
- Discussing experiences of abuse can indeed be retraumatizing for survivors, leading them to relive the trauma and potentially causing further psychological harm. This underscores the importance of providing sensitive and supportive environments for disclosures.[6]
- 94% of the pedophiles are not convicted, not because they are not guilty, but because it’s so hard to prove.
- As noted earlier, a significant majority of sexual assaults do not lead to incarceration. Specifically, out of every 1,000 sexual assaults, only 25 perpetrators will be incarcerated, highlighting the challenges in securing convictions. [7]
- Very few disclosures, typically between only 6% and 15%, are made to legal authorities.
- Research indicates that a small percentage of child sexual abuse disclosures are made to legal authorities. A systematic review found that children and youth often first disclose to peers before disclosing to a parent or trusted adult, and even fewer disclosures are made to authorities. [8]
- The average age at the time of reporting child sex abuse is about 52 years.
- Studies have shown that the average age for disclosure of child sexual abuse is around 52 years old, indicating that many survivors delay disclosure until well into adulthood. [9]
- 98% of abusers are unrehabilitatable/uncurable. They simply cannot change. Therefore, they should NEVER be around children.
- While recidivism rates for sex offenders vary, not all offenders are unrehabilitatable. However, certain studies suggest that pedophilia, characterized by a sexual attraction to prepubescent children, is a strong predictor of sexual recidivism. [10]
- The average number of victims per pedophile is 150.
- According to the National Sex Offenders Registry, a typical pedophile may commit an average of 150 sexual crimes in a lifetime. [11]
Please note that statistics on sensitive topics like child sexual abuse can vary between studies due to differences in methodology, definitions, and populations studied. It’s essential to interpret these figures within the context of the specific research from which they originate.
[1] https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21164210/
[2] https://evawintl.org/best_practice_faqs/false-reports-percentage/
[3] https://www.cdc.gov/child-abuse-neglect/about/about-child-sexual-abuse.html
[4] https://victimsofcrime.org/child-sexual-abuse-statistics/
[5] https://rainn.org/statistics/criminal-justice-system
[6] https://www.nsvrc.org/resource/resources-survivors-violence-disasters-and-other-traumatic-experiences
[7] https://rainn.org/statistics/criminal-justice-system
[8] https://bravehearts.org.au/research-lobbying/stats-facts/disclosure-of-child-sexual-abuse/
[9] https://childusa.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/SOLFactSheet2019.pdf
[10] https://bjs.ojp.gov/press-release/recidivism-sex-offenders-released-prison-1994
[11] https://childusa.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/SOLFactSheet2019.pdf